Tuesday, July 4, 2017

One Year.

    Hello, I'm a grateful believer in Jesus Christ, and I struggle with depression, grief, and post-traumatic stress.  My name is Leandra.......
     A year ago, in the blink of an eye, my wonderful life came crashing down.  Everything I had known and believed was over.  Over the next few months my weight plummeted to 93 lbs, I developed extreme insomnia, and a host of other issues.  I didn't think I was going to make it through this.  But, with God's help, and the help of some amazing friends and counselors, I did...one day at a time.  
    When I returned to the States, I was lost for help.  I started seeing a counselor, but she was, in a word, awful.  Hey, counselors are just people, and some of them stink at their job just like any other profession.  She did however point me in the direction of a faith based support system founded on the 12-step program of Alcoholics Anonymous.  This program however covers any issue one might be struggling with.  I didn't want to go.  Not because I didn't want help, but because I didn't want to need help.  I wanted my old life back.  It's a year long program, I made a commitment to see it through, and I always keep my word.  There have been many weeks that I didn't feel like anything was changing and the program wasn't working, but looking back at where I started, I can tell that it is.  I'm only about half way through the process, but I'm beginning to be hopeful.  
    It's been a year since that awful day, and I'm happy to report that my weight is nearly back to normal, only two pounds to go, most nights I can get a full eight hours of sleep, and my bad days are fewer and fewer.  Life is beginning to feel normal again, even if it is a new kind of normal.  For the most part, I don't mention things from my personal life in this blog, but I felt like I needed to pause for a moment to celebrate life and recovery, and one day victory and freedom from all this hurt because there is hope.  Thanks for letting me share.      

6 comments:

  1. Congrats on one year of recovery. Stay strong and keep your wonderful blog going.

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    1. Thank you for the support; it truly helps :)

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  2. Hello Leandra,

    Thanks you so much for posting this. I've been struggling to find Truth among the brokenness of humanity and I'm very grateful for your blog in slowly helping me to accept myself without compromising my modesty, faith, or sense of style.

    I might not know what you've been through nor understand your struggles, but I thought I'd let you know that you are an inspiration to me and have brought me hope in learning to love my natural thinness and beauty. It's been hard growing up with this society -- especially the Christian community -- as they like to shame me and criticize me for being this way as if I'm actually TRYING to attract attention with my figure or win approval through my looks.

    Thank you for being openly and beautifully you.

    With gratitude,
    Lani

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    1. Hi Lani,

      Thanks for your comment and thank you for being honest, it means a lot. Even though we've never met, I think you're beautiful. I'd love to talk with you more; if you're interested use the contact me form to send me a quick message to get a conversation going through e-mail. I'm here if you want to talk :)

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  3. Congrats on your one year. It is definitely something to celebrate. I pray for your continued recovery and future growth.

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    1. Thank you, Susanna for your comment, for your support, and for your prayers.

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