Red Lace and Cherry Blossoms

I took these photos back in the springtime when the trees were dotted with puffs of white blossoms.  Now it's the season of cheer when we need those lovely reds and greens to warm our hearts. There's really nothing like a red dress to cheer up the chill.

Shop the Look:

Showyoo Women's Off The Shoulder Lace Sleeve High Low Party Cocktail Swing Dress

Somewhere Beyond the Snow

    Staring out my window at winter today, and yes, winter can be lovely too, but more often than not I find it dreary and tedious.  I miss the sunshine and the kind of summer heat that most people find unbearable.  

    At the end of each winter I am filled with an almost Scarlet O'Hara-like determination, tightly clenched fist full of snow raised heavenward and shaking in the assertion that, "As God is my witness, I'll never be cold again!"  

    I've yet to act on it and move somewhere sunny year round, but the idea grows on me each year, and sometimes I think all I really need to be happy is a nice stretch of beach to walk everyday.

Similar 

Sunny Salutation A-Line Dress from ModCloth

Fluttering Stripes Midi Dress in Pink from Chicwish

Candy Pink Striped Midi Skirt from Chicwish

Golden Light of Dawn

The golden light in the woods was just lovely on this day.  The sun was rising and the world was glowing.  It was before the leaves fell of course, and I was determined to make the most of these photographic moments, even if it meant waking up at 4:00 a.m. to get all glided and watch the dawn.  Oh, the things I do for you lovelies.

 Shopping Info:  The Zest is History Heels in Navy From ModCloth in 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13
Eva Franco dress is old, but this is a similar 

Golden Bouquet Jacquard Midi Skirt

Almost Bonfire Time

    There really is no such thing as "being alone" in the country.  I've lived in huge cities and I know there's this notion that it's just too quiet in the woods, too isolated in the country.  I've never found this to be so.  Yes, there are fewer people, but there are so many other walk of life all around at every moment that I've never really felt alone.  

    It's time for our annual bonfires.  The time when we rake all our acres of oak and hickory leaves into piles to burn them away, promoting growth on the forest floor as well as protection from forest fires.  It's tedious work, but less so when all the animals come out to "help," which usually just involves walking through the piles and demanding every ounce of attention we can spare.

Shopping Info:  Similar Intelligent Around Town Coat from ModCloth in S, M

The Art of (Living Without) Regret

    I wanted to capture the moments--the beauty I saw all around me that appeared and faded so quickly without anyone else seeming to pause and notice.  How could I save them up and share them?  A camera seemed the perfect way and the world unfolded for me.  I spent years, more than I can remember behind a lens, never in front, trying to collect every beautiful thing. I loved the inner stillness that came from my forays into the wilderness or city streets to take photos.  My shyness was fed by hiding behind the camera to capture moments rather than be a part of them.  My nostalgia grew as I looked back upon stacks and stacks of beautiful things and special moments that for all my efforts I hadn't really saved at all.   Because, we cannot of course capture those moments and hold onto them as anything but fading memories.  It is better to be present in them, to live them and let them go.

    I heard it said that in a certain language photography is called "the art of regret."  When I read this, I didn't need to research it to see if it was true, I knew in my heart that this definition is correct.   It was time to stop forever looking back at these small cards of glossy paper that held things now turned to dust.  It was time to stop trying to preserve the moments and start living in them.  It was time to let go.  Time to forget.

    It was then, four years ago, that I turned photography into an outlet for my fashion and travel instead.  I stepped in front of the lens, started this blog, and began to open myself to this small corner of the world.  When my own world shattered two and a half years ago, I knew I could still come here and find everything sane and lovely and just as I had left it.  

    My life has changed, my heart has changed, my dreams have faded away.  I see it on my face when I look at these photos now, the before and after line drawn through my life, and again I feel regret to see the way that grief has etched its own lines that time would have tarried over.  I have to breathe.  I have to look away.  I have to understand that this was part of the process of unraveling one season and weaving another.  These lines are the scars of having fought a battle against pain, trauma and bitterness.  And I fight it still.  I continue to love the creativity of photography, but perhaps now I am ready for it to take a new path and I let go of what was and what I hoped might have been to what truly is and what could be.  I look forward to seeing where things will go and look back on what has been without regret.

The Flutter Leaves

It isn't really fall until you've thrown some leaves in the air at least once and there were about a dozen other groups in this park with exactly the same idea.  Just a few outfit pics today since today isn't really about me at all.  It's family photo time, which only comes once every decade or so.  It's bitterly cold and I can't feel my fingers, but it's important to the people I love, so I loaded up my tripod and camera and stepped behind the lens (mostly) to be the photographer.  I love finding the right location and the right lighting, capturing those silly candids, and since i also have to be in a few pics, there's always the fun of hitting the button and then dashing to my reserved spot in the group before the timer goes off.

 Shopping Info: Conversation Masterpiece dress in Midnight and Charter School Cardi in Navy from ModCloth

Biking Through Brussels

    I chose an outfit at random for today and added these pics I took this week of a bird in the red berry tree I drive by every morning to give this post a more Christmas-y feel.  Obviously I didn't have time to take any photos today with all the preparation that goes into such an important day.  No, it won't be a white Christmas this year, as usual.  And no, I won't get my kids everything they wanted.  And, no, my time spent with family won't be perfect.  But, none of that really matters.  What matters most today is that I spend time with family.  They are loved, truly and unconditionally loved by me, and each of them knows it beyond any doubt.  After all, the weather is the weather and stuff is just stuff.  And family, God bless them, are really just a bunch of weirdos I share DNA with and choose to love no matter what and who thankfully feel the same way about me.  So, today, on Christmas, I will sit back and let all those things that don't matter fade into the background, while holding tight all the things, and more importantly the people, that truly do matter.  This is my prayer for you on this day, that you would be warm, and safe, and surrounded by people you love and who love you.  And in the midst of all your celebrating, take a moment to breathe a prayer of thanks for all you have.  

Merry Christmas

Shopping info:  Biking Through Brussels A-Line Dress in Folksy Floral, Cool Way Sneakers from ThredUp.  Use my link to sign up and save $10 off your first order, Charter School Cardigan in Red

Classic Simplicity

If something works, then it works and keeps on working irreverent of time, that's why we call these sorts of things classics.  I think it's safe to say that a full skirt with a midi waist is in the Classic category.  Always flattering, always in style.

Shopping Info: Classic Simplicity A-Line Midi Skirt in Navy from ChicWish, Charter School Cardigan in Berry Stripes XXS, XS, M, Vero Viva Womens Plaid Puff Sleeve Flower Patchwork Top

A Captured Moment

Yes, in case you're wondering, there is film in this camera.  I found it at a place called Blue Moon and they'll develop it for me too.  I have boxes of photos, of moments all saved up.  Out here with my camera I'm like a child with a butterfly net trying to capture some small beauty.  It's funny how the woods have changed this year.  Last year it was this little section on the edge of our property where I did most of my photos and had the best results.  This year, it's the other side of the forest that's the most brilliantly colored.  I've routinely walked out here to check the progress of the leaves, but apart from this one bright yellow, the rest just muddied and faded away.  That's just the way of things, the unpredictability of nature and time.  At least I have this one tree to capture in the moment.

Shopping Info:  Bicycle dress from The Other Sparrows, Second hand jacket. All else is old.