A Birthday to Remember

    If you've read my blog over the last couple of years, you've probably heard me complain about my birthdays, so get ready for a doozy.  It's been a very busy week and to be honest, I haven't handled it well...at all.  My homeschoolers started public school for the first time ever, the movers came with boxes full things and there were some painful memories stirred up, and just as the movers arrived, my youngest made a tearful call and I spent 30 minutes trying to calm her.  I tried all the wonderful adive about how everyone is scared on the first day of school and how this will make her a better person, because she'll be able to help the new kids next year since she knows how hard it is to be the new kid, but in the end I resorted to bribery (cupcake dolls are back and I'll have one waiting for you in the car if you can just buck up and make it through the day) and it worked in two minutes better than all the previous 28 minutes of love, encouragement, and good advice I threw at her.
  
    And then there was my birthday, I'm 36 now.  It coincided with my yearly Dr. visit, at which I had hoped I would hear that I'm in perfect health, but instead was told that I need another test and probably to enlist the help of a naturopath for some holistic solutions to some minor problems.  My spouse also received a report that some aches and pains he's been dealing with need further scanning and scrutinizing.  All of this happened in the same week and most of it happened on the same day.  

    While I tried to take my own medical news in stride, getting his news crumpled me to a sobbing heap on the floor.  What a week indeed.  Fashion hasn't even been on my radar.  I'm hopeful that some good news is on the way from all these Dr visits, and that we'll soon get everything unpacked and settle ourselves into a routine.  Tonight I'm on my way to my support group meeting.  I haven't been in about a month, which may have contributed to the way I handled this week.  

    Every year for my birthday I do something I've always wanted to do.  This year for my birthday, in light of all these changes and stuff making me worry, I've decided fight for my life.  I was always fighting for the best possible life I could have, trying to be my best and do my best.  And when life knocked me out, I stayed down...for a while.    This year, on my birthday I've made up my mind that I can't go back to the way things were and I can't predict how things will go, but I love my family and my friends.  I decided this year, that it's time to get back up again and keep fighting.  It's time to stop looking back and to finally let go.  There's still happiness out there, good moments to share and good memories to make, and instead of cake, I think I'll have a slice of that instead.