Cut the Tags

Recently I wrote about a certain puff dress purchase that arrived with the tags still on but had food stains and pit funk that indicated it was far from NWT.  I don't want to disparage that seller because frankly, she parted with it at a price that made up for its dire need of washing, so I did what that soul should have done when she decided to wear it long enough to chow down on a churro and leave an olfactory impression; I cut the tags.

I'm a chronic tag retainer, the main reason is that I sometimes only wear something for photos and then resell it with a note that it is "NWT but worn for an hour for pics."  What I realized is that leaving the tags on has a psychological effect of making me nervous to wear anything lest it lower the resale value.  Eventually, these NWT items sit in the closet so long that I lose interest in the style and part with it, and usually for far less than I paid for it if I can get any compensation for it at all.

This, my dear friends, is no way to go through life.  Clothes should be worn and thoroughly enjoyed over and over again for as many years as possible before we finally part with them or repurpose them.  Actually, I'd rather repurpose than throw away as it allows me to get creative and gives old clothes a second life.  When my children were little we turned their favorite shirts into throw pillows for their beds when they outgrew them and I once turned an entire summer wardrobe that they had worn to shreds into a nice braided rug for their bathroom.  But, I digress.

I realized at some point during this past year that all my nicest things were sitting in my closet, made into outfits ready for photographs and never getting any actual wear because I want to keep them camera-ready or resale-ready.  Why have so many pretty things if I never actually get around to wearing them?  

To that end, I've mad a commitment to no longer buy clothes simply for the purpose of making a video or taking photos.  Taking photos is losing its draw and buying things only for that purpose is a waste of money, I don't even want to think about how much, and a waste of space as my home overflows with clothes worn for a photo shoot and now filling sale bins as they wait to find new owners.

Instead, I'm focusing on buying beautiful pieces that I will wear for years.  I immediately take the tags off and allow myself to just wear them without worrying about photos or resale values.  I'll just wear them and enjoy them until they give up the metaphorical ghost or can be reincarnated into something else.

I actually put this into practice a couple of months ago when the incident at the beginning of this post took place.  It has been incredibly freeing!  Everything is mine now and here to stay, not a prop and not in-transit from the shop, to me, to its next owner. 

I'm wearing things like pretty puff dresses to lunch dates at greasy spoons, because the clothes are mine and I can get them dirty if I want; they're not going anywhere.  I wear them to work or to a BBQ in the summer heat, then wash them and repeat.  Pretty clothes are meant to be worn and cherished, so buy the dress, cut the tags, and wear it 'til it's worn out.  It's yours; enjoy it!

Shopping Info: Selkie Baby Pinstripe French Cottage Puff dress from Boho Chic Clothing, Ivory Aria Flats from Vivaia

Autumn Pastels

I know it's nearly time to break out the rust, reds and golds for autumn, but I'm not quite ready to give up my pastels just yet.  I think you can wear some pastels all throughout the year.  Check this post for an example from 2020's glorious autumn, or simply keep scrolling, because today's post is loaded with pretty pastels that I will be wearing all fall and winter too.

Inspired by these Lavender Aria 5° Pointed Ballet Flats from VIVAIA, I've built my outfit around soft hues.  I love the contrast of the darker insoles with these flats, but they also come with an extra matching set of insoles too.  The comfort is beyond compare and I wear this style with everything, which is why I'm making it my goal to own one pair of these flats in every color.

I paired these lavender flats with a botanical mushroom printed top by Retrolicious, which I snagged at Unique Vintage's Sale on Sale for only $25.  With colors like salmon, dusty blue, baby pink, lavender, and sage, it pairs perfectly with all my pastels from skirt to shoes, and the leaf and mushroom print feel quite fitting for spring or fall.

If you want an even more girly look, check out the new removable bow clips from VIVAIA in matching shades.   Or, better yet, use my code BLEUVIVAIA and save 15% off your entire purchase from VIVAIA and select a few pairs of pastels and a few autumn colors too like Red, Ginger Yellow, or Olive Green if you're a little more traditional with your seasons.

As for me, I love a mix of both, so while you can certainly count on the fall colors making their appearance in my wardrobe soon, pastels will keep popping up now and then too.

Shopping Info: Aria 5° Ballet Flats from-$79 VIVAIA, Use my code BLEUVIVAIA to save 15%off your purchase.  Retrolicious Top from Unique Vintage, Nila Anthony Bag is old from ModCloth, Skirt is from Thredup

Bright Bows with VIVAIA

The best compromise between whimsical vintage and wear-to-work that I've found is the academia style, but rather than limit myself to light or dark, I've created my own genre called bright academia, so I can incorporate some of my favorite hues.

As much as I love the dark and light aesthetics, I need color in my life.  Thankfully VIVAIA not only has some of the most comfortable flats, but they have an amazing array of colors, so there's something for every outfit, but they work with any aesthetic I choose and now they have an assortment of bow clips as well.

I know it's a small changes, but small changes and little details really make all the difference and adding these little bows, just softens this style.

Now my favorite flats are even cuter and they perfectly pair with any look for work or play.  You can save an extra 15% off these comfy eco-friendly flats with code BLEUVIVAIA so saving the planet in style just got a little more affordable too.

Shopping Info:  Aria 5° Ballet Flats in Pitaya-$79 and Removable Dora Bows in Pitaya-$9.90 from VIVAIA.com, Save an extra 15% with code BLEUVIVAIA Sweater Vest from Unique-Vintage.com, Skirt from Chicwish.com

You Are What You Watch

Did you know that when the new Top Gun movie released, experts expected a sharp uptick in people joining the air force and navy air division?  They expected it.  I'm not sure experts expected the sharp uptick in young girls running away to Hollywood to become you-know-what-stitutes after Pretty Woman was released, but that's what happened nevertheless.    

Something similar although far less tragic happened when the Hunger Games came out.  No, people didn't make kids compete in a to-the-death style scenario, but there was a sharp rise in young girls' interest in archery.  In fact, there was an old archery field where we lived at the time that had gone to pot years earlier, and as soon as Katniss brandished her bow,  interest soared and the field re-opened with most classes being exclusively populated by girls aged 9-15.  Why?  

Because people are easily influenced by what they see.  That's why it's so important to pay attention to what you're watching; it has an effect on you whether you realize it or not.  Even though I try to pay very close attention to the messages in my media and the way they affect my thinking, in my own life I've noticed a number of television shows that had lasting effects on me. 

For example, when my children and I started watching Cupcake Wars, we began making and eating cupcakes weekly.  I had to stop watching the show before one of us got put on diabetes medication.  The Biggest Loser always inspired me to workout, Hoarders helped me get serious about cleaning, What Not to Wear helped me create a wardrobe I am proud of, and Golden Girls is the whole reason I learned to bake cheesecake.

Since I've been working at cutting spending, particularly on clothes, my most favorite thing to splurge on, I decided it might be helpful if I started influencing myself with what I watch, you know see if I can find that same positive motivation I found in those other shows, Cupcake Wars sugar-coma aside.  Enter Til Debt Do Us Part in which financial whiz Gail Vaz-Oxlade helps people get out of debt and get their spending under control.   

While my spending isn't quite as dire as the people typically featured, I do see some similarities between myself and them, which makes the advice Vaz-Oxlade gives them relevant to me as well.  

The main thing that all these episodes share is a switch from credit/debit to cash only until their finances are squared away.  I know it would take more time and planning than just carrying cards to cover expenses as they come up, but I think switching to cash only would go a long way to cutting unnecessary spending.

I've been playing one or two short episodes a day just to inspire me and remind me to keep my spending in check.  I'm not in debt, but I could definitely spend less on clothing and be more financially comfortable.

In our consumer driven disposable lifestyle, there's a fair chance that most of us are overspending somewhere and with inflation and whatnot, this is the ideal time to cutback on unnecessary expenses.  So, hopefully like those other shows before it, this little show will have a big influence on me and make me more mindful of where my money goes.  I'll keep you posted.

Shopping Info: Marie Ribbon Dancer Dupe-$44, Bettie Page heels from Amazon

The Customer Service Shortage

Everywhere you look today there are shortages.  It doesn't matter what it is or if a shortage makes zero sense, there it is, but there is more than shortage of goods these days, there is a real shortage on services as well.  I'm currently sitting here on hold.  I've put the phone down to let my arm rest and switched it over to speaker so if by some miracle someone at customer service happens to pick up, I'll hear it.  But I know they won't pick up.  You see, this particular place has a mandatory minimum 30 minute wait time on their customer service. If I told you the name of the place you'd know exactly what I mean. Every 10 minutes the muzak switches to a ringing for a few minutes that no one answers.  I know this because I watch the timer on my phone and it never fails to go down in that order.

 

Have you noticed the sharp decline in customer service out there for most of the major companies?  I have.  There seems to be a severe shortage of politeness, helpfulness, and just general availability.  So many business' customer service is just abysmal.  DHL's customer service is the worst, if you can get in touch with them at all, and Etsy's customer service is non-existent.  They have your money, so what do they care if you ever get what you ordered.  Try and reach out to them and you'll just be told to take it up with the seller.  More and more, I'm going back to small business owners like Ivory Sheep and Boho-Chic because they provide excellent customer service, in many cases they're even better than the service of the brands they carry.  In a world where everyone turns on each other over the stupidest things, it's nice to find places where someone has your back.

I'm still waiting, by the way, still listening to that same awful muzak on repeat, that's why I thought I'd use some photos from my vacation last year in this post, to remind me of a happier place and time, and maybe to mentally travel there while I wait....and wait.....and wait...................for 35 minutes now with three teaser rings and no answer still.

Update:  After an hour and fifteen minutes my phone died.  Guess I'll have to try again another day.

Social Media Faux Pas

I've been unfollowing a lot of people on social media lately.  I'm just tired of their schtick.  I want to see their pretty photos and occasional dips into their personal lives can be quite nice, maybe even necessary to establish a more solid connection.  That's not really where the trouble lies.  It's one thing to talk about your interests, experiences, and to try to connect with others, it's another to shriek your incredibly divisive politics.  I'm interested in people's stories; I'm bored to tears by their politics.  While I'm at it, I'm also tired of the asinine comments, you know the kind I mean, not just the rude or ugly things, it's the ones where people didn't really pay any attention and then make a comment intended to be some highbrow assessment as if they have an inside track from a distracted partial reading of a post or viewing of a video.  I've just deleted a couple of posts from what I can only assume by the user name is a very cranky old Karen.  (I don't throw the term Karen around lightly or often ,but it totally applies to this old crow.)  Dear Lord, please deliver us from the utter stupidity of others.

I thought the internet and social media were supposed to bring us all together and make the world a smaller place, but the world is more divided now than at any other point in history.  There's just no point to it other than satisfying our self righteousness and narcissism, so rather than shriek back, I just unfollow.  I don't need to agree with influencers on everything and for the most part, I have a pretty thick skin when it comes to differing on opinions and experiences in life, but most of the people I follow are for style only and when they spew hateful things, after a while, it makes it really hard to see past that and just see their style.

Seven years ago my blog started out being solely about fashion, but when I hit a few serious bumps in the road, I found that I did need an outlet for my issues.  After I began sharing, it felt so much more natural to be a real person with real problems, than to pretend that everything was perfect all the time, that I decided to allow myself some wiggle room in what I discussed.  My intention was to draw others in, to let them know they're not alone and no one is perfect, so it's not just ok to have problems, it's part of living.  So, while I hope I don't come off as badly as the shrieking harpies I've recently unfollowed, I know that's a risk, and I guess it's one we all take as we navigate this unknown territory of social media.

Leave Your Comfort Zone

For many years, I had a birthday tradition of trying something I always wanted to do.  Sometimes I found something new to love an enjoy, sometimes it was terrible, but at least I tried it and didn't have to wonder anymore.  I've had this little tradition (I can hardly believe it!) for 15 years now, but this year I'm thinking of changing it up.

One of the fun things about blogging and doing collaborations with so many different brands is that I am constantly getting to try things that I might not have dared endeavor.  It's been interesting, challenging, and a little scary at times but I've loved it.  

When Sungtin asked me if I'd like to try these Slouchy White Boots, I looked at them and thought that they were not something I would have chosen for myself because white shoes seem a little scary to me.  I live on a farm and dirt happens out here.  Fortunately these boots are made of a soft faux leather that is easy wipe down should I happen to get them a little muddy.

In spite of my fears, I wanted to see what I could do with these slouchy boots and after raiding my wardrobe and trying a few different looks, I found a few pieces to get me started and I loved the results.  

Not only do these knee high flats look perfect with my princess puff dresses, but I love the 60s vibe from my previous outfit so freaking much! I hope I get to collaborate with Sungtin again soon!

Since I've been trying so much lately, this year I've decided to celebrate my birthday with some old favorite instead, favorite restaurant, flea marketing, and just walking around.  Sounds perfect to me.  If you're in the market for something different checkout Sungtin's other boots, like these White Knee High Cowboy Boots

Even if you're not the princess dress or cowboy boots type, why not try something totally different and see if you find a new favorite in the process.

Shopping Info:  Selkie Coat of Arms Cottage Puff Dress, Sungtin Womens Slouchy Faux Leather Boots-$45.99, to save an extra 20% off these lovelies use code 20LQ8L2E