The Art of Leisure

Leisure is the ultimate thing we're all pursuing, yet how many of us actually enjoy our leisure time when it arrives?  We all tell ourselves that if we can just make it through this busy or stressful time, then things will slow down and we can enjoy a rest.  But, usually the next stressful or busy thing presents itself before we're even done with the previous and so life becomes this seamless ebb and flow of busy nothings and stressful somethings.

Stress and busyness often come to us in the form of things we volunteer for rather than are obligated to do, and they become so much a part of our routine that if/when we finally do have absolutely nothing demanding our time, we tend to be so unaccustomed that we restlessly seek out more drama to fill our lives, even going so far as to create it when it can't easily and organically be discovered.

There most certainly is an Art to Leisure.  It takes practice and persistence to find, then cultivate, then enjoy rest and peace.  To be honest, I have struggled myself with just relaxing since I've left my employment two months ago.  I have never in my life had so little demanding my immediate attention.  For years I have theorized that those who are always running from this activity to the next are really running from the thoughts, feelings, and memories that confront us in the quiet moments.  It's easier to hide from negative thoughts when we're constantly on the go.  Sooner or later, though, they always find us.

Even though I have tried to live a life of complete honesty with myself, not masking but dealing with difficult thoughts and experiences when they come, so that my quiet moments can be pleasant rather than haunted, even I have had a difficult transition to these long quiet days with just myself and my thoughts.  To be honest, I had some very dark hours in the beginning, but it's been six weeks now and I have had to remind myself that it took an adjustment time to get used to being so busy and it will take time to adjust to this.  Ultimately, I just know and feel it all the way to my bones that I needed to rest, I needed to pursue this time of rest.  I have spent so much time giving everything I've got to my work that I felt like I had literally nothing left to give to anyone, not even myself.

Giving myself that time of transition, instead of getting frustrated and rushing to fill up my days again, has meant having to deal with somethings I didn't really want to, but in the end, I am once again finding peace and quiet and rest in the quiet.  I am enjoying my leisure instead of always running.  And that has made all the difference in my life in this season.

Outfit Info:  R. Vivimos Dress from ThredUp, 

shoes from Shein, Book from Rifle Paper Co.