The Perfect Photo Session?

I don't like posting photos of my family because I feel that my children need their privacy to grow up, be awkward, mess up, and just generally be human.  I don't want to use them as a ploy to gain followers or involvement.  They're people, not products.   But, they were so pleased with how our family photo session turned out that they gave me permission to share these photos of our family.

Social media has done a real number on our society.  Keeping up with the Jones' has gone to the extreme thanks to social media posts of pretty people on perfect vacations in the throws of blissful living.  Sitting at home in sweat pants on a Friday night, sharing a block of cheese with the cat, we come across these photos and feel suddenly inadequate.  We want that life, we want that Perfect life.  The cure?  There's really only two ways to get over FOMO, either get out there and try to have the perfect body, perfect wardrobe, perfect vacation, perfect photos, perfect life and eventually come to the realization that nothing is perfect, no matter how it looks on social media, or just stay off social media altogether so you don't feel inadequate.  Maybe your life could use a tweak or two, but more than likely, you're just fine and totally normal doing what you're doing.

I tend to stay off social media as much as possible, it's one of the reasons my interaction rates are so low on all my platforms.  I don't need to feel bad about myself for just having a very real and very normal life.  I'm not opposed to creating Kodak moments, but my expectations are very realistic.  I have also learned over time that all those perfect photos of perfect people range from "not telling the whole story" to "just totally fake."  When we lived in Japan, we were packed in like sardines and we knew all the details of our neighbors' lives thanks to our paper thin walls.  I heard the way they spoke to each other and treated each other in real life, then saw their smiling faces on social media dolled up in a fashion I never once saw in real life and it sickened me how fake their posts were.  So, in the interest of transparency, let me tell you a little something about our family photo session. 

We haven't done family photos in seven years because our family has been through a tough time that made me unable to look at past photos and of which I didn't want current photos.   Now that things seem to be getting better, I decided it was time to take some photos together before my children grow up and move out.  I rented a studio so that I could take our photos myself  (Mistake #1).  I wanted us to look our best (Mistake #2) in some of my most favorite gowns and spent some time (hours!) coordinating, locating, and steaming our dresses.  I booked the studio for Saturday at 10 a.m. so that no one had to get up early and yet it was early enough in the day that once we were done people could do other things with their day.  Even so, no one wanted to get up, people dragged their feet getting ready, refused to shave their legs, decided to cut their own bangs waaay too short and shave off half their eyebrows the night before, tried tons of dresses deciding that none would work, fought over shoes, etc, etc, etc.  It was chaos.

When we arrived, one person still wasn't ready and spent 15 minutes of our 60 minute session in the bathroom applying makeup.  The studio owner was very helpful in setting up some props and lighting and left us to our own devices.  It's hard enough for me to take my own photos, but when you have a group of people who don't know how to pose and fight to slouch, look away from the camera, and just generally don't want to be there, it becomes nearly impossible to set up a shot, push the button, run to take your own place, and have everything look great so you get the most amazing photos in one hour.  Of the hundred or so photos that I took, we probably got a ten usable shots.  It was frustrating and irritating, like herding cats, and I was afraid that all our smiles would be fake, but a wonderful thing happened.  Somewhere near the last quarter of an hour, we started laughing, really laughing, and most of these smiles were genuine.  The girls looked at the photos I had taken and decided that they liked the way they looked; they felt pretty and were happy to be there.

After the session, Mr. Bleu decided to treat the girls to coffee.  Can you guess what happened next?  That's right, one of them spilled coffee all over her (my) dress.   I didn't even bat an eye at this point.  I knew I could wash it as soon as we got home and most likely get the stain out, and I did.  Then I settled into my chair to decompress.  Anything worth having is going to take hard work, and this was definitely hard work.  Are the photos perfect?  Nope, so don't look too close.  If I could have spent all my time behind the camera I would have been much happier with how everyone was posed, but since I had to split my time in front of and behind the camera, I knew it wasn't going to be perfect.  We got a few family photos dressed in our best with some true and heart-felt smiles.  It's not perfect, but it's real and that's good enough for me.

Shopping Info:  Star dress is from Teuta Matoshi, Ruffle dresses are from Selkie

Update Your Fashion Rules

I don't remember the matrons in my life being terribly interested in fashion when I was growing up and yet they all knew the same set of fashion dos and don'ts somehow and followed them religiously.  In spite of the fact that none of them ever really seemed to notice or care what I was wearing, if I committed a fashion crime, they were swift to *tsk, *tsk, and reprimand me. I couldn't understand how they knew these things or why we all had to obey....and a little curious what would happen if we all just didn't anymore. 

Sometimes these silly fashion rules come along and for whatever reason, we all just go along with them unquestioningly.  No one knows exactly why we should or shouldn't do...whatever..., we just know we're supposed to abide by said rule, especially when “all the experts” say so.  Even more baffling is the way that these rules stick around for generations.  Ah, but it seems as though the winds of change are finally coming fashion's way.

In the last couple of years we (“we” being the fashion world and the general clothing wearing public) have done away with a number of strict fashion rules that have been around for decades like the one about not wearing white after labor day and the one that says you shouldn't mix prints.  If you've been reading this blog for any amount of time you've definitely seen me break that one once or twice...or more...Ok, I do it like every week. 

I'm not saying fashion rules are a bad thing, far from it.  If you don't want to put much thought into the composition of an outfit, if you're a no-nonsense kind of women or if it all just seems too daunting, then by all means, follow the rules.  Because, let's face it, rules are made for a reason and breaking them while still looking chic can be rather tricky.   But if you're feeling creative or adventurous, try to see them less as rules and more like guidelines or suggestions.

One fashion rule I regularly find myself breaking these days is pairing brown and black.  It's one of those set-in-stone rules I was raised on and it was tough to break that mindset, but once I did, it felt pretty liberating.  Now I do it all the time and today's outfit is a prime example.  Certain shades of brown go better with black, like cognac, tan, and of course the fabulous rust color of this Yasmine High Neck Ribbed jumpsuit by FemmeLuxe.  The jumpsuit came with its own belt in matching color, but I wanted to break up the palette a little by adding a thick black belt to define and draw attention to the waist. 

A good tip for mixing black and brown is to make sure you add more than  one item to your outfit in that color so that the look is balanced.  In addition to the belt, I added black heels and a black faux leather bomber jacket.  Since this jumpsuit has a mock turtle neck I accessorized with layers of pearls and a chunky ring since teensy jewelry pieces would have been lost and the statement necklace really adds that extra bit visual interest that really ties an outfit all together. 

The great thing about a jumpsuit is the way it can make a figure look longer than it is and this particular jumpsuit is made of a breathable fabric, light, soft and with some stretch to it, so while it looks sophisticated, it feels incredibly comfortable.  I also credit the vertical striped ribbing for enhancing that lengthening effect plus, the texture breaks up the solid color. 

I'm 5'6” --right smack in the middle of average height--and have a pear shape that can be difficult to dress at times, but I feel like a supermodel on the runway in this jumpsuit.  My legs look like they go on and on.  It's quite nice and actually seems to balance my shape quite well.  One important tip to wearing jumpsuits in general is to make sure to properly tailor the length of the pant legs on a jumpsuit though.  They should fall at the ankle or just slightly below.  Too long and you may look like a little girl playing dress up.  Properly hemmed and you're ready for the catwalk.

Shopping Info:  FemmeLuxe Rust High Neck Ribbed Jumpsuit - Yasmine, Heels and Sash Samba Belt from ModCloth