Finding Time

Whatever it is you want to do with your life, please believe me when I say, You Have the Time.

Anytime someone said, “I just don't have the time,” a certain acquaintance of mine loved to remark, “You have 24 hours in a day just like everyone else.” This acquaintance of mine wasn't particularly wise, in fact in many ways I used his choices and attitudes as examples of what-not-to-do. But on this one point, he was spot on, and it was irksome to everyone who heard it because it was true. That phrase totally eliminated all excuses that we all have for not getting things done. No one person has any more or less time than another, it's simply a matter of how we use it. Of course we all have obligations and responsibilities that demand a certain part of our time, but what about the rest?

Let's suppose you are a S.E.W. kind of person, meaning the only things you get done in a week are Sleep, Eat, and Work. There are 168 hours in a week. Let's suppose you get the recommended eight hours of sleep per night which gives you a weekly total of 56 hours spent sleeping, and let's say 21 hours each week spent preparing and consuming meals, and 40 hours spent at a full time job. That's only 117 hours of your weekly total. But, let's get a little more realistic about obligations and include in that total a generous nine hours for bathroom business and getting dressed/undressed, and let's say another 3 hours doing laundry, dishes, and some light cleaning and roughly 9 hours spent commuting. That leaves 30 hours unclaimed by the “have-to's” of life. You probably call those unclaimed hours “the weekend” but somehow those hours are full too.

What would you do with 30 extra hours? Chances are you already have an answer. Everyone has things they'd like to do but tell themselves they don't have time for. Would you like to take up a hobby like painting or knitting? Wish you could be more active and squeeze in a workout each day? Are you staring gloomily at that microwave meal, longing to cook your own healthy gourmet meals? Thirty hours would be enough to do any--or all-- of that wouldn't it?

So, if you have that much time, why does it feel like you're always rushing around, with no time to spare? Where is all that time going? The first place to look is the nearest screen. The average person in America spends 2.5 hours a day on social media, this does not include other screen time spent watching t.v., etc. The average European doesn't fair much better. And I would guess that most of us call that time our “winding down” from all the have-to's of the day. The trouble is that screen time is incredibly addictive and there are more temptations to waste time than ever before. Not only can we watch entire t.v series all in one go, but social media, video games, and online shopping abound to draw us into a virtual world that actually leaves us feeling more drained than when we sat down.

The good news is that there is a solution to all this chaos, but it's not what most people want to hear. The answer is self control. Sorry, I know that sucks, but it helps to get a plan and then be committed to sticking to it.

Decide how much time you need. What is the minimum time commitment this new hobby or activity is going to take? That's the place where you start and then build on from there. When I decided to get active as a new mother, I knew I could never work out for an hour a day, all in one go, so I decided to do 30 minutes a day 4 days per week. Then after that became part of my routine, I found time to squeeze in an extra 15 to 30 minutes a day or an extra half hour on another day or two each week.

Are you an Early Bird or a Night Owl? Your body has natural peaks in energy, some people get out of bed at 4 a.m. ready to face the day and some don't get motivated until 9 p.m. Figure out when you're are at your creative best and set aside a chunk of time to be creative. I would caution you against letting that creative time run late so that it starts affecting your sleep. For me, wanting to exercise, the best time was first thing in the morning. I never have the energy at the end of the day. On the other hand, I feel more creative at the end of the day. I do my sewing in the evenings after dinner instead of watching t.v.

Give Yourself Room to Grow. It's tempting to set your goals high, especially when you're excited and full of will power, but be realistic. As I mentioned, when I first started my postnatal workouts, I wanted to work out an hour a day six days a week, but realistically I only had 30 minutes a day, sometimes less, and only 3 or four days a week. So, in the beginning, I made my commitment 30 minutes a day for two days a week because I knew I could keep that and then begin to add on. As life changed and my children grew, I found I had more time to exercise, but still never a whole hour at a time. I increased my workouts to include an afternoon walk, usually with one child walking and with one in a Bjorn style carrier. In this way I was able to meet my fitness goals over the long term and was patient with myself while I incorporated lasting change into my schedule. For a while I struggled with a.m. depression. I found it extremely difficult to get out of bed even one minute early in a cold dark house full of sad memories. I was back to square one in that regard but I kept looking for a strategy that would get me moving four to six days a week again instead of two or three. The answer to that came in the form of an even busier schedule. No time to mope, I have to get moving now, and even earlier than ever, but it motivates me to get out of bed or not only will I not exercise, but I'll also be the last to shower which means a cold shower. No, thank you.

Stay in the Middle. You will likely find that as you carve out time for something you enjoy, you'll want to devote more and more time to it. This can be a wonderful thing, but remember to stay balanced. If you begin neglecting the have-to's for the want-to's, you're in the ditch on the other side of the road and you need to head back to the middle. Don't skip work or neglect your family so you can do your hobby and keep your screen time. Work and family first, then the fun stuff. I have seen marriages fall apart because of someone's obsessive hobbying and people have lost their jobs for spending too much time goofing off instead of working. So, be smart with how you prioritize your time.

Remember when you plunk down in front of your screen next time that your life is ending one click at a time. One of life's major goals is to minimize regret, so that at the end of it all we don't look back and say, I wish I had done_____. Better get out there and start doing it, whatever it is, while you have the energy and while you definitely have the time.