Life After Selkie

Over the years, I've broken up with nearly all the influencers and brands I've ever loved.  The end usually comes because either their style changes or mine does, but once a company or individual puts their politics so far ahead of their product and their customers all the magic immediately dies for me.

I had an anticipated moment of weakness in mid-September with the Taste of Fall launch and bought three pieces, and as much as I wish I could say that was the end of it and now it's truly over, I have struggled.  I have unsubscribed and have made a concerted effort not to go there on a regular basis.  The longer I have been away, the more disenchanted I have become.  Telling people they have to agree with you or leave was a good swift slap to wake me up from this dreamy daze that's had me in a Selkie-centric world for far too long.   It's as if my eyes were opened and I suddenly remembered that all the problems I had with Selkie in the beginning were still there.  And all the times that someone commented that my dress was too short or asked me if I were concealing a baby bump with that stupid empire waist and puffy skirt were echoing in my ears.  If it were any other designer, I would have jumped ship long ago, but with Selkie I stayed, like a sweet summer child, hopelessly enamored. 

A friend of mine once told me that when she was about 16 years old she started dating a much older man.  He was immediately obsessive and controlling, but she thought she was in love.  Her parents did not approve, but rather than tell her that and drive their rebellious daughter further into the older man's arms, they merely asked if she would like to spend her summer living with her older sister and her family out-of-state.  She was young and eager to travel and so she accepted.  Big sister was advised to keep her busy having so much fun that she wouldn't have time to think about the man and since this was before cell phones and internet, she would be able to get some distance from the relationship.

It worked like a charm.  Three months later, after zero contact with the man, who had been blowing up her parents' phone demanding to see her or find out where she was, she came home with a fresh perspective on him.  She didn't just end the relationship of her own accord,  she was finally able to see him for the pervy-predator he was.  I'm not saying Selkie is pervy, although the way they do their collection drops is the most addiction-activating thing possible, so maybe they are predatory.  What I am saying is that sometimes we can get so wrapped up with someone or something that it's easy to be blinded to the fact that the relationship has become unhealthy.  

Have you seen my blog over the past year or two?  It's pretty much all Selkie.  Even though I started out hating the puff dress style and panning it as the worst design of all time, eventually I not only came around, I moved in and put my name on the mortgage.  I planned my work schedule around certain Selkie drops and worked as much overtime as possible to save up for them.  When people complained about defective zippers, uneven hemlines, non-ecofriendly materials, high prices, things arriving with stains, dodgy customer service, incompetent inventory managing, I looked the other way.  I think it's safe to say my relationship with Selkie was pretty unhealthy.

So, it's been 30 days.  I've had some space, got a little distance, and I can honestly say I think I'm seeing clearly again, but I think I still need to keep my distance.  I'm not saying I will never hook up with Selkie now and then for a quick dress or two from a seasonal drop, I'm only human, after all, but the obsession is over.