Friday, January 4, 2019

Finding Your Day of Rest

People today seem busier than ever.  We're all in a rush to get to the next appointment or meeting.  I'm one of those busy people too and While I can manage a full docket for a while, the time comes when I need to re-prioritize my schedule and shave off the unnecessary things, the busy nothings as Jane Austen called them.  Even then, I still need a regular time of rest.  Now, I'm about to get a little religious here, but it will be ok, I promise.
     Under the Abrahamic code shared by the Jewish, Christian, and Muslim faiths, people are instructed to take a sabbath--a day of worship and rest, once every 7th day.  But I don't know anyone religious or non-religious who actually observe a true day of rest.  How many people do you know that turn everything in their lives off once a week to rest?  I know plenty f people who claim to be resting while binge watching the most asinine garbage on television, but that's not really resting.
    What is a true day of rest?  I'm so glad you asked.  A day of rest is just that—rest.  That means, first and foremost, clear your schedule and plan to be at home for 24 hours.  Don't answer the phone, don't turn on a single screen, computer, phone, or tablet, or anything else, not even your kindle.  Here are a few more tips to get you started:

Get everyone on board.  Tell your family in advance that you (or everyone) will be having a quiet day.  If you have a family, I think it's better to get everyone together for a day of no screen time, etc.  If you live on your own but have a roommate or a houseful of them, tell them in advance that you will be unavailable that day.
Family time. Don't think you can't have a day of rest if you have a houseful of people.  You can still find quiet, you just have to do a little more planning.  And always save a space, 30 minutes to an hour, for a board or card game or quiet craft with the family.
 Plan Ahead.  Do your chores, run your errands, finish any homework the day before your D.O.R. or let them go til the day after.  I like to make sure that my major chores like laundry and tidying up are done the day before a "sabbath", so we can all rest in a clean home and clean clothes.  I do a little advance cooking like making a stack of pancakes or a healthy banana bread the day before so the kids can fend for themselves for a meal or two.  I  also like to keep some fresh fruit out on the counter for the kids to snack on during the day.

Get comfortable.  This isn't really a day to take a break from hygiene, especially if you live with other people, so don't skip your morning shower. Instead, focus on things you don't normally have time for like taking a long soak in the tub, manicuring your nails, pumicing your feet, and when was the last time you flossed?  Doing this before settling in to some comfortable clothing makes you feel relaxed and lets you breathe easy.  When it comes to clothing, I prefer cotton fabrics with a loose fit.

 Eat well.  I like to start my days of rest with a healthy breakfast and then plan at least one deliberately prepared meal later in the day.  My D.O.R breakfast usually looks like this:  ½ a plain bagel with a serving of cream cheese, a scrambled egg, a cup of fresh fruit, and herbal tea.  I take my breakfast at the table with a book, or on the patio while watching the sunrise.  Though if I try to eat outdoors, I typically get interrupted by animals who are hungry for attention.  At my next meal, I plan something that I love but don't usually have time to prepare.  My favorite dish is mushroom ravioli with sauteed baby spinach, green onions and shredded Gruyere on top with a glass of white wine and more fresh fruit for dessert.  I would recommend staying away from sugar, processed and fast food.  Feed your body nourishing things on this day so it can rest and restore itself.
 Exercise a little.  Exercise is such a wonderful healing tool, but on my days of rest, I don't do anything high intensity or strenuous.  The very best kind of exercise to promote restfulness that I've found is a simple walk, preferably in some quiet spot in nature if you have something close by.  Taking a walk, even just for 15 minutes can help you sort through and process things troubling your mind.  If you live in an area where taking a walk will only cause you more stress, do 15-30 minutes of light yoga, stretching or breathing exercises. 
Church and friends?  Here is a place where you need to use discretion.  Personally I don't find going to church or visiting with a friend to be restful—at all, and I think they should be avoided on a D.O.R.  I don't know anyone who comes home from church or lunch with a pal who feels more rested than when they left.  The travel, the activity, the interaction, all these things take energy rather than give it.  Consider writing a letter to a friend or reading a sermon or other book rather than going out.
Take a nap.  Set aside some time in the afternoon to lay down.  Commit 30 minutes to just being still in your bed or on the couch.  Close your eyes, or look out the window, and just breathe.  Your mind may start to go into hyper mode over this thing you need to get done, or that thing you forgot and you better get up and take care of it!....but don't get up.  If you struggle with this, keep a pad and pencil nearby and for the first five minutes, let yourself write down things that pop into your head and need to be taken care of.  After that, everything will just have to wait—and it will—for a half hour while you rest. 
Facing Your Fears.  I have this theory that the reason so many people seem to be running around like mad all the time is that they really are running from emotions, memories, and problems.  Staying busy is like a drug, it helps us forget those things that are bothering us.  But, as with all forms of self-medication, treating the symptoms doesn't bring healing.  In the silence, in the absence of entertainment and distraction, those painful things come to the surface.  I would encourage you to use this day to see what surfaces for you and then, stop running.  Deal with the issues and watch as through repeated time spent dealing you being to gain an inner peace.
Journal it.  As with that pad of paper and letter to a friend, writing things down can help us to work through issues we're facing.  Take a few minutes during your day of rest to write down what you're feeling, what you're facing, or what you're dreaming of, what your thankful for and all the feelings associated with those things.
Breaking bad habits.  You might feel tempted in the afternoon or evening to reach for a remote of turn on a screen, or scarf down some junk food, but don't.  You won't die from a little boredom and if you can't go a day without something, it's pretty sure sign you have an unhealthy attachment to it.  Be aware of the things that are nagging you for attention, journal about them too and try to be mindful of doing without them more often so they won't control you.

Reflect.  As you day of rest draws to its close, it's good to take a few moments to think, maybe even jot down a few words in your journal, about your day.  Be thankful for it, even if you were super bored, and appreciate the opportunity to turn the world off and be at peace, and then take a few more moments to be thankful for all you have—the people, the opportunities, the activities-- then close your eyes and know that tomorrow you will be far more ready to handle it all than you were when the day began.
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