An Unexpected Dress

I didn't make any plans for Memorial Day weekend.  Frankly, it's only one extra day and I have been exhausted from sharing a single car to do what amounts to twice the activities we normally do.  Because of this, I planned to spend the three day weekend doing a whole lot of nothing.  The weather was perfect for it too, but when I went outside to sit on the stone patio or have tea under the trees, I couldn't get comfortable.

Everything was shabby and overgrown and disorderly.  Unable to rest, I got up and got busy pulling weeds, sweeping, trimming hedges, cutting down thistles, etc.  We bought new plants and created some new little flower gardens.  It took two and a half days to set things in order, but sometimes you have to work hard before you can really relax.  So, with all the hard work done, we mixed up some spiked lemonade and headed out to the stone patio to relax and enjoy this seasonable (for a change) weather.  

When all the hard work and subsequent relaxing was done, I wanted to take a few photos in these lovely white wild flowers.  Selkie did a third partial drop of their Out of the Tower collection and I hadn't intended to buy any more dresses from Selkie's Spring '22 collection, but then I did. 

The Rapunzel print Marie Dress was on my wish list, and I had been looking at it on other sites for a couple of months, but the price tag was a little too high for it to make the final cut.  It just released on Selkie in this most recent third drop for $389, but with the holiday weekend, I found it on Aquelarre for $271  and decided to buy. 

It was my first time buying but it was a great experience.  There were only two left, but I got one and not only did I get a great bargain, but it arrived just three days after purchasing.  It also was wrapped with ribbon and a hand written note of thanks, which was so thoughtful and I love it when shops go the extra mile. 

This dress is lovely and a falls a few inches above my knee, so it will likely get more wear than my Marie Gowns which are floor length.  It also doesn't seem quite as poofy and full in the skirt, which I definitely love and the neckline doesn't seem as open as the gowns which is another plus.  The skirt is a top layer with ruffle and three printed layers of organza underneath.  The bodice is lined with opaque fabric so it's not see through, which I greatly appreciate.

Selkie has instituted a new size chart with this new collection and I think it fits so much better than the old.  Previously, the XXS was too tight and the XS was slightly big.  After consulting with Selkie, they recommended that I size down on the new chart and the XXS is now a spot on perfect fit.

Shopping Info:  Rapunzel Marie Dress-$389 from selkiecollection.com, Also try Aquelarreshop.com

Confront Confrontation

This pretty little dress was quite troublesome.  It has an amazing print, a price that can't be beat, and so much going for it except the awful empire waist.  Rather than avoid the dress, I immediately planned to address its troublesome area and I'm so glad that I did because I would have regretted not having this dress in my wardrobe.  While I wish that everything could always be perfect and never have any problems, if something as simple as clothing isn't this way, then all other matters in life surely won't be either.  

If there is one guarantee in this life it is that troubles will find you, no matter how peaceably you try to live your life.  Knowing that troubles are a certainty should make us more prepared to handle them when they arise and yet most of us are caught off guard by confrontation.  While I don't enjoy conflict or confrontation, I have learned that it is best to meet most situations head on and as soon as possible.

Most people in this world do not like the thought of confrontation and seek desperately to avoid it.  What they often find is that in their attempts to escape confrontation, they prolong discomfort, encourage tyranny, and become prisoners to their own fear and constant need to escape difficult situations.  Confrontation is not something to be avoided.  Before I tell you why confrontation should be embraced more often than avoided, let's briefly define confrontation.

If you think of confrontation as equivalent to fighting and fighting as equivalent to verbal or physical violence, this is where you've missed the mark on confrontation and likely why you are trying to avoid it.  A better word for fight is argument since we may have a heated discussion that accomplishes much without the use or need for any kind of violence.  Even so arguments, especially if you don't have much practice with them can be quite scary, but they actually perform a vital role in human relationships, not just romantic or familial relationships, but the way in which all humans relate to one another.  

Notice how in the animal kingdom, offspring are trained at a young age on how to "fight," even training each other with a certain yowl that a bite was too hard.  In this way their learn their own strength and the limits of others.  Human beings need this as well although we do not always need to use physical force as much of the rest of nature does.  While it's true that some confrontation leads to physical force, that's almost never the place to start and not a complete definition of confrontation.  Confrontation is addressing a problem.  While there are many routes to take here, the way in which you address the problem can, and should at least attempt to be, quite peaceful.  Peaceful confrontation is as simple as saying, "we need to talk about X."  Lay out your concerns, your questions, or your grievances and then work toward some resolutions, answers, and boundaries.

 

Unfortunately, there are people in this world that want control, power, chaos and they don't understand peaceful talks unless they are speaking to someone of equal power because with the exception of Jesus, no one gains power through peace. In such cases, there are only two options: assertive confrontation with the possibility of aggression, or repeated submission to an ever growing tyranny.  And, the most demoralizing thing of all is that should you manage to quietly endure a petty tyrant long enough to see them topple, you will quickly find that nature hates a void and that empty position always and will almost immediately be filled by a new tyrant-in-training, have someone new to avoid and placate, and so the discomfort continues.

Would it not be better, before the petty tyrant becomes a full-blown tyrant, to address the issues as they come up and perhaps through these initial confrontations establish some strong healthy boundaries before this person gets out of control.  And, if a peaceful solution (followed by an assertive solution if necessary) cannot be reached, then to walk away from the tyrant rather than to live under their ever-growing oppression?  It sounds simple, because it is simple and yet, I watch most of the people I know continually living with the discomfort, the oppression, rather than speaking up because they're "not comfortable with" (read that as afraid of) confrontation.  How do you overcome this fear?  The same way you overcome most fears, confront it. Confront confrontation.  

When you begin, try not to think of it in terms of winning or losing a "fight," but rather in learning something each time you address an issue.  Learn to listen, learn to stand firm, learn when to strike and when to be still, when to empathize and when to resist manipulation.  Start small and let it grow until you become comfortable speaking up, standing up, and dealing with issues instead of dodging them.  Even though it isn't easy to get comfortable dealing with issues and people, it will be worth the effort to have these burdens over and done with, off your back, instead of carrying the weight of avoidance around with you at all times. Tackling the tough stuff is part of an honest and peaceful life.  And if there is one thing I have learned it's that the sooner you deal with problems, the easier they tend to be solved. 

Shopping Info:  Painting Print Puff dress-$24 , Headband and Wide belt-$4.50 from Shein

Try a Little Red Dress

All this talk of Little Black Dresses is very important, but I can't talk about wardrobe staples without mentioning Little Red Dresses.  Yes, black will work for any occasion, but there is something about red that makes it a must-have.

Red is a standout color, an attention getter, and it scares a lot of women because they don't feel worthy of attention.  If that's you, let me kindly persuade you to give red a try, especially something as flattering as this Flutter Sleeve V Neck dress from Milreason. 

At least once in her life, every woman should be able to don a little red dress and absolutely own the room.  If you get only one LRD, let this Flutter Sleeve V Neck Dress be the one.  It has so much going for it and I feel amazing and still totally comfortable in this dress.

With a fitted waist, flattering V Neckline and those glorious flutter sleeves, this little red dress has me in heaven.  Plus, it has pockets!  This dress costs only $35 so you can try it and love it without a big financial investment.  And the best part of all is that for a limited time you can save 10% off this dress with my code 10milmil.

If you've fallen into the neutrals rut, it's time to be bold.  Don't shy away from color or attention.  Don't be afraid to standout, especially when it's in a dress that makes you look your most amazing.

Shopping Info: Milreason Women’s Casual Cocktail A-line Dress Flutter Sleeves V-Neck Vintage 1950s Party Dress with Pockets Knee Length-$34.99  Save an extra 10% with my code 10milmil beginning 5/24/2022 and only for a limited time.

Little Black Dresses with Milreason

There are few things in this world that make me feel more self-confident and just generally amazing than a great dress.  You know the kind I mean, the kind with the classic, timeless style and the amazing fit like this Casual Cocktail Dress from Milreason.

It's been a minute or two since I've had a collab with Milreason, but I've never stopped loving their styles, and with at least a dozen graduations to attend this year, I'm more in need of a Little Black Dress than ever before.

When it comes to LBDs it's all about the details.  This particular LBD has a lot going for it like cap sleeves with those little ties at the cuffs and the buttons down the front and the best part of all is that you can save an extra 10% off this beauty and the V Neck Flutter Sleeve dress I'll be showcasing tomorrow with my code 10milmil.

Hello, pockets!  I can't get along without them, so I'm so glad that Milreason added pockets to this dress.  It also has a full skirt, and I added a ruffled black petticoat underneath for a little more fullness and because I can't resist those vintage vibes.  I'm feeling very Audrey Hepburn-esque in this dress.

While I staunchly believe that having a little black dress is the cornerstone of every well rounded wardrobe, I don't believe that gorgeous dresses have to break the bank.  This LBD from Milreason comes in at only $37 and that's before my promo code, so you'll save even more.

 

My promo code begins May 24th and is good for a limited time, so don't wait to make this LBD a part of your wardrobe and join me back here tomorrow to see my next dress in my collab with Milreason.

Shopping Info: Milreason Women’s Casual Cocktail Dress Stretchy Cap Sleeves with Bow Tie Vintage 1950s Party Swing Dresses with Pockets-$36.99  Save 10% off this dress with code 10milmil

Much Ado About Mucha

Every now and then I come across a print that I positively obsess over; I just can't get enough.  This Mucha Print from Selkie is such a print.  There were plenty of nice prints in the Spring '22 collection, but the Mucha print is what really stole my heart.  I am a longtime lover of all things Alphonse Mucha, ever since I first saw a book mark with In Quest of Beauty on it, I've been a fan.  Years later I studied the great man while taking a class on the history of illustration and graphic design and I loved him even more.  

Czech artist Alphonse Mucha was born in 1860 and rose to fame in 1895 while living in Paris after creating the poster for the play Gismonda starring acclaimed French actress Sarah Bernhardt.   Bernhardt was so pleased with his work that that she ordered 4,000 copies of the poster and a six year contract with Mucha. It has been said that Sarah fancied herself as the true driving force behind Art Nouveau by so supporting Alphonse's career.

There are people in this world who make it a more beautiful place and Alphonse Mucha was truly one of those people.  From theater posters to Job cigarette labels, everything he touched became a work of art.  Not to mention that he revolutionized the idea of posters as art and forever immortalized French starlet of the stage Sarah Berhardt who led an amazing life in her own right, would surely have faded from all memory had she not been captured in Mucha's illustrated advertisements for her plays which are today still sold and displayed around the world one hundred years after her death. 

It would be another two years before I would finally travel to Paris, to see the great city with all its architecture, museums, and culture, including revered works of the Art Nouveau movement of which Mucha is surely the forerunner and poster child himself, pun intended.  

I took home many gifts for family, but for myself, I only took, photos, memories, and a single poster of Alphonse Mucha's Bieres de la Meuse, which hung in every home I occupied until it began to fray at the edges and I decided to put it away until I could have it properly framed.

And so, you see, my recent purchases of multiple Mucha printed dresses goes beyond a mere fancy for the newest fad.  It is in fact the fruition of a longstanding love affair with a time when flourish was conventional rather than extravagant, a time when skill and artistry were poured into one's work no matter how trivial it may seem.   It is the celebration of the brilliant works of a great artist in a wearable tribute.

As far as a quick dress review goes, let me just say that this dress has its issues, like there doesn't seem to be a strapped bra in the world that will not show with these wide set sleeves which are constantly falling down, and lots of buyers struggle with the bust to waist ratio, but all in all, there is a lot to love about this dress and I am willing to overlook the flaws. 

Decided Pros to this dress include that the cotton is much lighter then the Etoile dress, the print is stunning and the fitted waist and full skirt are incredibly flattering if you can manage to figure out which size you need and snag one before it immediately sell out.

If you haven't been waiting for them for seven months like me then my crazed search for these Mucha dresses may seem ridiculous but when you factor in how long I've been waiting an the fact that so many other people are still waiting and will perhaps never be satisfied, maybe this kind of obsession is just what it takes when it comes to Selkie.

Shopping Info:  Mucha Print Day Dress from Selkiecollection.com

Delightful Dupes

In the midst of this puff dress craze brought on by a combination of Selkie and Bridgerton, I know that it has taken a lot of time and working a lot of extra hours for me to afford my few designer puff dresses.  It would be nice to have a few inexpensive pieces in the mix, and I think I've found some really great dresses for one-tenth the designer price, so I had to share.

There are a few shops on Aliexpress that aren't pulling that old trick of using stolen designer photos.  Nope, they're taking their own product photos and videos, which is rare on Aliexpress and highly appreciated as it made me feel like I could trust what I would be getting.

This silky pink puff dress has a really gorgeous Venus print on it and all the fullness of a designer puff dress.  Rather than lots of printed layers, there are two layers of white fabric lining this dress, which I suspect is one way of saving on the the manufacturing cost, but since no one is going to see those lining layers, I don't mind at all.

Is it short like the designer dresses?  Oh, my, yes.  I had to purchase a pair of peach bicycle shorts to wear under my puff dresses, because even with a belt, there is very little dress covering the bum, and since I'm so tall, I felt I needed a safe guard.  You can see them peeking out in the pic below.

 

For under $30, this dress is so pretty, but I have to admit that even after all these designers and dupes, I am still not a fan of the puff dress style.  It looks cute on certain body types, but still not as good as a dress with a waist can make every body type look.  I don't think a single one of these puff dresses looks better without a belt than with.

So, while this style doesn't have me in an empire waist state of mind, I am leaning in to the trend a bit, especially as summer approaches.  This particular dress has very soft, comfortable fabric, that isn't itchy or coarse, and the print is very pretty.  

It comes in straight sizes, just S-M-L, and I ordered the small, since that was all that was available.  It's one size up from my usual, but still fits pretty well, so pay close attention to those measurements if you decide to order.

If you have been desperate to try the puff trend, but don't want to sink $300 on a first time purchase of a puff, this little beauty is a great way to try the trend without spending a ton.  I've ordered a bunch of Ali dupes and inspired dresses and I'll be trying them all over the next few weeks.  I should have a full video to release by the end of May, but if you're impatient, I'll be posting reviews here as the dresses arrive.

Shopping Info: Venus Puff Dress-$30 from ZJoan Headband is old from Shein, Heels are old from ModCloth