Time of One's Own

Do you ever have days when you just don't want to talk.  There's something on your mind and you just want to quietly mull it over until you have it all sorted out?

Alone time has been in short supply in my life for one reason or another for the last five years or so.  I'm a very lonesome person and I have fewer than average words to say each day, but when there's something on my mind, I have none at all.  It comes to the point where I'm very irritated at any interruption to my thoughts.

I think often of Virginia Wolfe's essay "A Room of One's Own" in which she discusses the need for a place of solitude and repose.  I agree that having a space dedicated to solitude makes it easier to think, but not everyone can afford that luxury in space of their homes or time in their schedules.  Don't lose heart if you crave some quiet time but haven't the time or a room of your own. 

While it's true that being in a full and busy house makes it difficult to find a little time to sit in contemplation it's not impossible.  I try not to think of it in terms of absolutes like Alone vs. Not Alone, or Busy vs. Resting, but rather I try to see opportunities.  When I lived with my parents, had roommates, and then became a parent myself, I wasn't often able to get away.  I have found my times of reflection and solitude to be more a state of mind when a room of my own was not available.  It's the work of busy hands that frees up the mind.  The simple tasks like mowing the yard, ironing, washing dishes, and gardening become the time when my mind is free to wander.

It may seem like I'm working intently at some mundane task, but chances are my hands are merely on autopilot while there are far deeper meditations going on inside.  At the end of such things I either have my thoughts sorted or I move on to another task until I have the peace I'm searching for.  I'm not sure anything would get done around here, if I didn't need my alone time to get away and think.

Shopping Info:  COLLECTIF MAINLINE CORDELIA DREAMY FLORAL TOP, Bettie Page Heels, Blue SKirt

Simple Alterations Create Great Dress-pectations

If I had my druthers, every dress,  no matter the cost or the material, would fit perfectly right out off the box or off the rack.  Unfortunately the more experience I gain in the world the more I find that most clothing could use a little tailoring to make it the perfect fit and some clothing is just beyond saving.

After buying a few designer gowns from Teuta Matoshi, I decided to try the inexpensive dupes and see if the price tag was really worth it or if there were bargains available for those who are willing to look.  I tried a total of 6 Matoshi gowns and 5 dupe dresses and the result of this experimentation?  In my experience, you really do get what you pay for.  Sorry to say that the dupes are pretty disappointing, but there were a couple of dresses that were acceptable if I could get around a pretty major issue which was the bra cups.  Ugh, they are awful and they look so awful on me.  But, they're such pretty dresses I wondered if I could salvage them at all.  Upon closer inspection, I decided to take a risk and sew a bra to the foam cups.  I hoped it would work, but kept my expectations pretty low.  The result?  See for yourself:

Before          &            After

It's a small thing that makes a big difference in the way a garment fits your shape and leaving out things that provide structure produce a sloppy, baggy fit that benefits no one.  I'm over the moon that I get to keep this dress and that it actually fits now that I've tailored it.  If you want to read about exactly how I did this, check yesterday's post.

If at all possible, it's better to buy something you don't have to alter and in my opinion it is worth it to pay a little more for something that fits you well as is.  But, if you find something really beautiful and/or that's a great bargain but needs a little work, don't be afraid to tailor it to fit your shape.

I don't want to mislead you into thinking that I just impulsively jumped into altering this dress.  Quite the contrary.  After trying it on and seeing how it fit, I looked at this dress several times, examining it from all angles.  Then I spent a few days, or a week thinking about how I could fix it.  Look and think.  Think and look.  Until I just sat down and started working on the solution that I had decided on.  

I still didn't know if it would work, but I was willing to try.  Just be sure you consider your options if you truly want to avoid damaging the dress.  Let's face it, taking a risk doesn't always pan out, so it's better to do as much planning as possible before you dive in to a project like this.  In the case of this dress, I knew that trying to take out the cups and simply trim them down wouldn't work because the fabric is cut and sewn to match those shapes.  

Approaching it that way would involve a major overhaul that I may not have the skill for, definitely don't have the machine for, and would likely result in torn fabric--it's so delicate--and a useless dress.  So, I had to think of the least aggressive approach that would yield the best results.   Even so, with all my thinking, looking, and planning, I knew there was a chance this wouldn't work out.  On the other hand, I like the dress enough I didn't want to part with it.

While it's true that you run the risk of ruining the dress, if it doesn't fit you're not going to wear it anyway, so why not take a chance or send that dress packing.  There's no point in it taking up space in your closet if you don't love it and it doesn't love you back.

Now, I have a dress that I love and can wear with confidence.  I brought it along today to the old mercantile.  I rented this space for an hour and I brought along as many pretty dresses as would safely fit in my car, but truth be told I got a little daydreamy just wandering around and looking at the old building so I didn't have as much time for photos as I would have liked.

I guess I'll just have to come back here again in the near future and try to really focus up....or else just devote my whole hour to exploring and forget about the photos entirely.  Either way I'll be wearing a pretty dress for the occasion.

Shopping Info: Pink Hearty Dress from Aliexpress, Pink Heels by Bettie Page

Fixing an Aliexpress Dress

Last week I took my daughter (dramatic music!!!!!) Jeans Shopping.  For me personally, I hate jeans shopping.  I buy two pairs every three to five years and wear them until they fall apart.  Such is my distaste for the experience of going jeans shopping.  But last week wasn't about me, it was about my baby.  She received her initiation into the world of buying jeans, and it was, as expected, a trial by fire.  

Gone are the blissful days of you're 8 years old, so you wear a size 8 and there's an adjustable elastic band inside to ensure a proper fit and none of that awful back gap that happens when a girl squats down or bends over.  Now my daughter has entered the world of trying on tons of sizes and styles to find one that will fit not just in the store but by the end of the day.  I can't tell you how many times I've bought a pair of jeans that fit like a dream in the dressing room, but after two or three hours of wearing them they seemed to stretch out, leaving me with a low hanging crotch area that awkwardly makes a pop sound with every step.  Ugh!  Nightmare!

There are styles that are tight where they should be loose and loose where they should be tight, weirdly high or low or blousey, or puckery.  And no matter what size you're looking for, that's the one they don't have.....store after store after store.

Well, after hours of shopping and trying, and for some reason the only things we could find in her size were always just the one on the mannequin.  She found a nice pair of jeans and a pair of shorts, got them home annnnnnnd, you guessed it, the back gap thing happened.  She was frustrated and  downtrodden.  I told her to get used to it, this is what jeans shopping is like.  The next day, after some rest and a little distance from the shopping experience, she took matters into her own hands and put in two darts at the back of her shorts so that the back gap was gone.  I was super proud of her for taking a difficult situation and making it better.  

It seems that fashion trends gravitate toward a certain shape and no matter what that shape was, it was never mine.  As a result I've been altering and creating my own clothing since those troublesome teenage years when my curves appeared just in time for ultra low rise waists and skinny leg jeans.  Blech!  Now I often find myself with clothes that don't fit just right whether through poor designs, poor quality in the sewing, or just a style that needs a little tailoring to look good on me.

Recently I bought several dresses from Aliexpress and they were all fairly disappointing.  There were a couple of dresses (from the same shop) that came so close to being nice, but they both had these awful bra cups that were just giant foam disks. Sitting so low on my chest that they made me look flat and saggy, they looked awkward, they felt awkward and they didn't come close to fitting.  In the case of these dresses, the designs are stolen/copied, or however you want to say it, so I can't blame the designs because I know the originals fit like a dream.  I think it's just poor work, cheap materials, or an ignorance of how bodies change at different sizes, because these cups look like they belong on a dress that is several sizes larger.   They are shapeless and rather pointless as far as support is concerned.  But the dresses were so close to being nice that I really felt, with a little shape in this one area, they could be quite lovely.  So, like mother like daughter, I set to work to try to fix it.  

I started with the pink hearty dress and based on the neckline I selected a nude balconette bra (an old one that I didn't mind relegating to just using for this dress).  I lined up the cups just below the seam of the dress cups and pinned it to the center of the dress.

Then I used matching thread and whip stitched all the way around the perimeter of the bra, stitching it to the inside layer of the dress' bra cups so that the stitches would be hidden.

I did this all very quickly, it took about 15 minutes, just to see if my hunch was correct and that this dress was salvageable with just a little shape to these weird foam discs.  It's so interesting how just a few small changes can make such a huge difference in the overall look of a garment.

Immediately I was feeling hopeful as I looked at the new shape of the dress, but the real test was about to come because I did all this sewing just minutes before I left to wear the dress for photos.  Want to see how it turned out?  Join me right back here tomorrow to see the final result of this sewing venture.

Detour Ahead

It was a beautiful warm spring morning, huge gray clouds were moving across the horizon and the sunlight streaming through made the greens greener and the mountains an impossibly deep blue.  And I might not have noticed it all if I hadn't taken a wrong turn this morning.

The road work that plagues the highways all summer long has begun early this year and my normal commute now includes a detour that adds 20 minutes to my route.  On these mornings where I only have to drop my daughter off at school and come home, it's an extra 40 minutes in the morning and again in the afternoon.  It makes me a little more anxious to get home and make the most of my reduced time there.

Hoping to save myself some time and maybe find a less busy detour, I took a different road back home today.  After a good half hour I found myself....right back where I started.  That's right, my short cut looped around and I had to start over.  

Sitting at the the stop sign, I dropped my head to the steering wheel and breathed a defeated sigh, then sat in silence a moment.  That's when I heard a rumble of thunder in the distance.  I looked at the horizon and saw the most lovely spring storm.  I rolled the windows down, turned the music all the way up, and decided to turn this set back into a joyride.

I'm always going somewhere in a hurry.  I rarely get the time to just sit back and enjoy the view, which by the way is really spectacular.  This morning I enjoyed the sights and smells of springtime while singing my heart out to a song on repeat with lyrics to explicit to listen to with kids in the car.

We don't always know where the road will take us, but with the right attitude, any detour can be an adventure instead of a setback.  My little "short cut" turned out to be a relaxing mini-sabbatical from my hectic schedule.  It set the tone for a more joyful and appreciative approach to my day.  

Shopping Info: GownTown Womens 1950s Cape Collar Vintage Swing Stretchy Dresses

April Showers

Playing with colors and prints today, I bought this yellow raincoat for my trip to Iceland and it got a lot of wear in that short week.  I still use it now and then, not just for rainy days, but also when I just need a little more color in my day.  I love bright colors and mixing prints.

It's funny how we dress for the way we live, or want to live.  My wardrobe has changed not just the job do, but also with the places I've lived and the people in my life.  In Japan I had to dress to be ready to walk in all weather.  In the Pacific Northwest, it was mainly about wearing warm layers and having an umbrella handy at all times.

Now I'm rarely out in the elements unless I'm home on the farm and it's so easy to make an outfit change to accommodate whatever situation arises, that I rarely think too much about what I'll wear each day anymore.

 

It's nice to have the experience at planning to be out in all the elements, but it's even better to have the freedom to wear whatever and be totally fine.  Although I do always bring a coat with me in the cold months, because you never know when you'll have car trouble and have to walk to get help, I don't carry an umbrella and this raincoat spends more time on the hanger than I'd like.

I brought it out today for a little stroll on this windy spring morning and turns out it's not just handy for those impromptu spring showers that can make walking around the shops a little unpleasant, but it makes a great wind breaker too.

Dress from The Other Sparrows

Pink Ivy Dress

If you follow any #princesscore instagrammer, then you've probably seen all the amazing locations, particularly castles, where they take their gorgeous photos.  If you seen them, you may feel a little envious that there's nothing so gorgeous where you live. 

Places like that are in short supply in this part of the world, but beautiful places still exist, you just have to do a little more looking.  This Pink Ivy dress from Teuta Matoshi was high on my wish list and once I'd saved up enough to afford it, I knew I would also need a gorgeous location in which to photograph it.  I don't know the history of this beautiful old building, but it was worth it to book a little time here.  A tour is nice, but there's nothing like having your run of the place for an hour or two so you can explore at your own pace.

By the looks of the place, I'm guess it was an old mercantile or factory, built in the mid to late 1800s.  There were so many rooms and levels to explore and all these glorious windows over looking the city streets.  Now it's filled with elegant spaces, chandeliers, and lots of spaces for sitting and dreaming.  It was worth the effort to find this place and worth the small fee to book some time here.  I'll definitely be back in the near future.

Just a quick review of this Pink Ivy dress from Teuta Matoshi.  Even though I ordered my usual size, this one ran a little small and the under skirt is impossibly tight.  I don't really need an underskirt for this, so I may have to remove it.  The dress is covered in a raised white ivy and glitter,, and the bodice has an amazing fit--no bra necessary, and thankfully, because the open back would be ruined by straps.

There is a zipper down the back with an eye hook at the top, though I still needed help zipping it up.  And there is a single button to connect the top piece at the back (sorry no photo of that, my hair got in the way!)

Although I would recommend getting a custom size for the right fit because doing a return or exchange can be a little difficult, this dress is definitely a gorgeous little work of art, the style is so feminine and completely flattering to your shape.  I've never yet been disappointed by one of Matoshi's dresses.  I cannot recommend them highly enough.  I'll release a video on this dress soon for a more thorough review.

Shopping Info: Teuta Matoshi Pink Ivy Dress, Use my link to save 10% off your purchase, Bettie Page Heels

Pink Hearts and Dogwood Blossoms

The woods again are white, only this time it's dogwood blossoms instead of snow, so I don't mind at all.  The dogwoods have outdone themselves this year with more blossoms than I think I've ever seen; it's so lovely!  Most of these flowers are clustered in the tree tops however, so I don't feel like I can accurately convey just how lush they are this year.  

 

I've been spending as much time as possible outdoors and it feels amazing!  I am so happy it is finally spring.  Even though, in this part of the country spring is just an epic battle between winter and summer with three months of bouncing back and forth between shivering under four layers and sweating in a sundress and sandals.

I'll take it though, any little break is better than unending cold.  I decided to wear one of my pretty dresses to help celebrate the arrival of the dogwoods.  As much as I like the fabric in this dress, the real problem is that these bra cups are huge and look weird.  Darn, this dress was so close to being a bargain. 

I've had a look at it and I don't think there's any way I can alter it without destroying the dress.  This whole experiment has been rather interesting and a little fun, and I've definitely learned a few things, namely that most of the reviews on aliexpress are fake or at least you should be very wary, especially when they say, "looks exactly like the picture." 

It's taken me a quite a long time to get these dresses and then to sit down and make the video.  (If you'd like to see my video review, it's now available and posted below.)  Right now the great outdoors is just calling my name and I'm trying to savor each beautiful day as it comes.

Shopping Info:  Pink Hearty Imposter Dress