The Changing of the Garb

Here we are at the end of November and the seasons are changing again.  I wrote a little in some previous posts about the experiment I began three months ago.  After taking the past two years to thoroughly clean out my wardrobe of clothes I had been accumulating for seven years or so I found that I still had a ton of clothes.  The difference after the clean out was that all the things left in my closet were pieces I absolutely adore and don't want to part with even if it's been a while since I've worn them.  

Trouble was, I still wasn't wearing them.  I was so overwhelmed by the sheer amount of clothes in my closet that I didn't get around to wearing most of them.  Instead I reached for the same few things day after day and week after week.  It was a waste to have all these pretty things and never wear them, so I decided to try a little experiment.  Over the next year I will have my entire wardrobe on a seasonal three month rotation.  By cutting the sum of my apparel into manageable quarters, I hope to get far more wear out of my clothes.

The reason I haven't done this before is that the weather where I live is very fickle and all the seasons tend to blend together so much that it's hard to know exactly when to put the warm things away and bring the cool things out and vice versa.  With my current system, none of that matters.  I have a selection of clothing for a season and I can layer if it's cold or un-layer if it's not, but that's all I have to choose from for three months. 

At the end of this first quarter, I can safely say I have loved it.  Autumn has been a delight while wearing all the best and prettiest that I have not just for the season but for the holidays as well.  I have a number of Halloween themed things that I have forgotten about until the holiday has passed for the past few years and it always made me sad.  This year I wore every single one of my themed things because instead of being buried they were front and center.

Now it's time to change again and I'm after three months, I'm looking forward to the change and ready to bring out all my pretty winter plaids and prints, my wools and flannels for three more months of joyfully choosing what to wear each day instead of being overwhelmed and defaulting to the same tired old garb.

I don't know that I'll feel this way at the end of a year, but for now, I think this has been one of the best decisions I've made to simplify my life and get more enjoyment from my clothing collection (let's be honest, that's what it is) that I may have ever made.

Shopping Info: Freya Jeans and Rai Jumper from Collectiflondon.com

The Romantics

I've come to realize that I am nothing if not a dreamer, full of high ideals and hopefulness, thinking and expecting the very best of others, and very much asleep to reality until I slaps me awake.  And after a very long, bitter dose of the waking world, I have found that I am better off asleep and dreaming.

I suppose that's why I love my dresses and my photographs so much; they're all a part of the dream.  They are the world as I see it, the world as I create it, rather than the dreary old world as it truly is.

I am also a reclusive romantic, I'm afraid.  Craving affection but restrained by shyness, it's a torment in the real world, but a lovely thread in the tapestry of fantasy.

It seems like fate then that I would find my way to a dress like this, the Romantics Dress in the Unicorn Defends Himself print.  This print is itself a tapestry depicting a tragic mythology.  I wish the unicorn had its own anthology of stories like King Arthur but as far as I know, its stories, if there were any, have been mostly lost in the pages of time.

As far as dresses go, this one is unlike any other that I own in that it has two drawstrings at the front of the skirt to create a subtle or a grand swoop at your preference.  The only thing I have found somewhat puzzling is what to do with those strings.  

The strings drag the ground when the skirt is fully extended but once the skirt is drawn up, I was stepping on and tripping on them while I walked around Aldi in this dress.  I may end up just trimming them because I doubt I'll draw this skirt up often if ever and they don't need to be quite so long to function.

I have zero regrets about buying this dress or the Ritz in this print.  They're both lovely and I intend to wear them year round until they disintegrate because I adore the print that much.  This autumn collection has had some really nice pieces but this one speaks to me personally in a way that few others have, and this is why I am so obsessed with Selkie.  If you can get this dress, please do so, fellow dreamer.  You won't regret it.

Shopping Info:  The Unicorn Defends Himself Romantics Dress from Selkie and From Ivory Sheep

Autumn with Voodoo Vixen

Thanksgiving gave me many, many reasons to be thankful as I spent time with family and friends and remembered that I am truly blessed for each and every person in my life because even when they annoy me, I'd rather have the people I love close to me than be all alone.  We are social creatures, after all, made to be together.  And, even when it takes a lot of work, it's better than the alternative.

Our Thanksgiving feasting and fellowshipping carried over into Friday this year, so I missed out on all the usual Black Friday hullabaloo.  If you were like me and otherwise occupied on Black Friday, not to worry, there are still a lot of great sales happening.

In fact, my friends at Voodoo Vixen are running some wonderful sales this weekend which include this lovely leafy lace fit and flare dress available in UK sizes 6-16 for only £23.

Tis the season of giving, so if you or someone in your life love pretty dresses, check out the sale at Voodoo Vixen for something with gorgeous vintage vibes that won't break the bank.

Shopping Info:  Sophia Autumn Fit and Flare Dress-£23 from VoodooVixen.co.uk

The History of Heroes

Among the myriad of people I came into contact with over the past festival weekend, I overheard something that stood out to me more than any of the other conversations I had or overheard.  There was a man, born and raised locally, who is doing quite well in his life, one would almost say he's doing great things, and when one person complimented him for getting his life together, the other quickly chimed in with a list of his past transgressions.  It was as if to say no matter how much he changed, no matter how much he accomplished, no matter how great he became, he would never escape his history.  For some people you will never be anything more than your mistakes and your sins.  I'm not sure what the naysayer expects from a hero; I suppose they want a champion to be and always have been perfect and faultless, but truly only one such person has ever existed and they crucified him anyway.  The fact is that we all have skeletons in our closets, horrible, horrible skeletons, things we wish we hadn't done but we can't undo.

If you watched anything in the Marvel universe, you may have noticed a pattern emerge in the stories of the most financially successful superhero movies and it is this:  the hero starts out selfish and/or weak and then gains his/her true strength when they learn to care more for the well-being of others than themselves.  When the hero starts out amazing and perfect and then becomes more awesome audiences cringe--This is why Captain "Mary Sue" Marvel, who was so panned by audiences that film makers actually reduced her role in the final movie, not because she was a woman, but because she was annoyingly, tediously excellent at everything all the time.  This is why most people prefer Marvel's faulted warriors to DC's shining knights who are unattainably perfect in all ways.  The one DC exception traditionally being Batman whose life is filled with past trauma and inner conflict and who is also, not surprisingly, the most beloved and the biggest box office success of the DC franchise.  To be clear, I didn't watch Captain Marvel as general audiences hated it but in my own life, I found equal sides for those who liked and didn't like it that I've remained placidly sitting on the fence, paralyzed with indecision about whether or not to spend the precious hours of my half-way-over-life watching it.

So, if we love it in stories so much, why is it so difficult to accept in real life?  Why can't we accept that some people, shocking as it may sound, are not the same person today that they were 5, 10, or 20 years ago?  In a word, fear.  Fear of this sort grows many branches but it all has the same root.  We fear that if we trust this person, if we believe them we may be deceived and hurt and rather than feel that pain, we refuse to allow them to change.  One branch off this root is jealousy.  On the surface it seems like we want what they have, but at the root of this jealousy is fear.  We fear that if this change is genuine, it means that all the excuses we've made about why we aren't better ourselves aren't really true.  If that person can change from sinner to hero, so could we.  Rather than accept that our excuses are lies, we instead say that the other person's change is the lie, that it's merely a façade.

In the end it all comes down to our fears, which are intended to keep us safe.  They are intended for the preservation of the self, and if overly indulged always become a prison. When I think of people in my life who have made huge mistakes and then learned from them and gone on to become better people, I can't help but think of what a sad and empty life I would have if I were resigned to never give them a second chance to be better and earn my trust.  While I agree that someone with a checkered past should be approached with caution, why not allow them to prove through their actions and words that they have indeed changed rather than writing them off entirely as once bad, always bad?  Why not see someone else's success as inspiration to reach higher instead of making excuses for why we haven't tried very hard?

Some people never change, but for better or worse, most people grow, evolve, and often for the better.  What is a hero after all if not a regular person with faults and weakness who learns to let go of fear and stop prioritizing Self.  A hero is just someone who chooses to deny themselves in a moment of importance or every single day, have a little faith, and sacrifice themselves for others.  If the very worst person can turn into the very best, then that means that there is a hero waiting in all of us.      

Shopping Info: J Crew Sweater and shoes from ThredUp, Cord Shorts from Forever 21

I Love Colors

If you were to ever meet my parents one day and if my mother took a particular liking to you and decided to show you photos from my teens and early 20s, you would probably rub your eyes in disbelief, grab the photo from my mom's hands and insist that this couldn't be Leandra!  This drab creature wearing all black or occasionally very, very dark gray, must be a fey changeling, because, good gracious, where are all the colors?!  It's at this point that I would walk in and ask who you are and why you're at my parents' house.  After a some explanation as to your identity and my 180° spin-about on wearing colors followed by a hearty laugh we would walk away friends.

I adore colors (now) and mixing as many colors onto one outfit palette as possible is my jam, but it wasn't always so.  My reasons for avoiding color included a hefty dose of teenage angst, a fear of standing out, and a dash of ignorance about how to wear/mix colors in general.  If any of that sounds familiar to you, let me encourage you that the angst will fade with the teen years and once you learn a little about what looks good on you and what colors work well together, the fear of standing out will dissipate too.

The easiest place to start is with a print that you love.  Starting with a print is the easiest because all the color mixing is already done for you.  All you have to do is choose 1-3 colors from the print that you want to wear with your print.  For this lights skirt that I bring out each year around the holidays,(see previous outfits here and here) I have lots of options on colors and try to do something different with it every year.  In the past I've done oragne, red, and blue.  This year I chose a bronze crop pullover from MAK and some Hunter green tights from WeLoveColors and I absolutely love the look.

If you're not ready for something quite this colorful, start with a basic plaid or floral print and then just add one to two colors from the print itself.  Accessorizing with one or two colors from the print will have different outcomes your outfit and you should be able to get lots of unique looks. 

After you start feeling comfortable working with colors (and also getting compliments on how great you look!)  branch out to more bold prints and adding more colors to your wardrobe.  Tights and tops are a great way to accessorize and play with colors too, that's why I love WeLoveColors for all their amazing colorful tights and YeMAK has pullovers and cardis in every hue.  Life's too short to wear black all the time.  Live life in color!

Shopping Info:  Chicwish skirt is old, Bronze Pullover from MAK, Nylon Tights in Hunter Green-$17.50 from WeLoveColors

Thankfulness

Thanksgiving was always a blur of feasting and family time that I looked forward to each year.  We began our day at my dad's parent's house seeing all his sisters and their children and spouses.  My dad was a surprise baby, so all of his sisters and by extension, their children as well, were much older than the equivalents in our family.  My brother and I were in elementary school when all these cousins were in their teens, driving and being 80's-awesome.  It was a very traditional feast of turkey and pie and something called ambrosia salad, which I wanted to love but ended up sneaking into the trash every year.

After the meal, all the women gathered in the kitchen to chat and nosh on leftovers while the men gathered in the living room to watch the game and fall asleep in front of the t.v.   All the men except my dad who never liked sports of any kind, a distaste which our entire family still shares and I have passed on to my own children.  Come to think of it, I'm not really sure what my dad did.  Maybe he found a quiet place to hide until the festivities had passed.  That was certainly a something I did as I got older, but as a child, my brother and I tried to interact with the cousins and if we failed to be cool enough, which we pretty much always were, we dug out a cardboard box of ancient toys and busied ourselves wondering why anyone ever thought these things were fun until it was time to go.

Right about the time we could comfortably re-button our jeans, it was time to go to my mom's parents' house and feast again at the evening meal.  This gathering was my favorite of the day because here the cousins were all the same age as us and while they were still cooler than us, in the absence of anyone else to play with, we had a wonderful time together at the kids' table.  The kids' table, weather permitting was outside on the porch, as far away from the adults as humanly possible.  I'm not sure if my mom's parents didn't like children or if they just thought we'd all have more fun if we were segregated by ages, but it did work because we could barely hear the laughter inside from all the laughter outside.

After the feast, if there was daylight enough, we took a walk in the fields and woods around their house, playing, talking, laughing.  I don't remember us doing that little tradition where we stopped to say what we're thankful for, but looking back these memories are some of my most treasured and those days are something I am thankful for still today.  Because of those wonderful holidays, I know how important it is to make the effort for the holidays, to go to all the places even if I'm tired, to get up at dawn and make the food when I'd rather sleep in, to choose something lovely and seasonal and dress up for the special days when they come around.  We're making memories and it matters.

Since it's already winter here, I've decided to don a plaid flannel skirt with a crop pullover from YeMAK and some lovely Magenta Fishnet tights from WeLoveColors for that bright color pop.  When it comes to sweaters I'm a longtime fan of MAK, but these crop pullovers are new to me and rapidly becoming a favorite for wearing with my high-waist skirts and jeans.  When you wear a crop with high-waist jeans you don't have to worry about the tuck-in line.

And, you may recall that I tried some fishnets from WeLoveColors last autumn.  WLC dyes all their tights in-house and they carry an amazing range of sizes, not to mention they also do dancewear, gloves, thigh-highs, and more.  I haven't really worn fishnets often in my life because they're usually black and I have plenty of black tights already, but these colorful fishnets are my new favorite accessory.  With just the perfect amount of color and coverage, they look amazing with skirts and shorts and they're so comfortable.  There are more outfits with these tights in lots more colors on the way soon!

I wish you a very happy Thanksgiving, and whether you celebrate Thanksgiving or not, don't forget to be thankful for friends, family, and all you have as we head into the holiday season.  

Shopping Info:  Magenta Fishnet Tights-$16 from WeLoveColors.com, Crop Pullover from YeMAK

One Top: Three Cardis

A great print is in an invaluable thing, a versatile thing because you can wear it so many ways and for years to come.  The easiest way to find a versatile print is to choose something in neutrals or something with lots of colors that work well together.  It's been a while since I've done a demo on the ways that changing your accessory colors can change the whole look when you have a great print.

 

For today's post I've selected a J. Crew plaid blouse from ThredUp and black trousers with red bow heels.  The only thing I'll change in each outfit is the cardigan and I'm using three button down cardis from MAK in Kelly Green, Royal Blue and Red.

Red is warm and confident and against this red cardigan, your eye immediately sees the red in the plaid print.  It makes a bold statement against the black and gives me definite holiday vibes.

Kelly Green also has a bit that holiday feel after all, anytime you see red and green together most people think of Christmas and winter.  However, green is not as warm as red and while the statement is still strong it isn't quite as striking either, which is great if you don't want a power color, just a pretty color.

When I look at the change, I notice that the yellow and green in the plaid stand out far more against the green.

And now for the blue.  Suddenly I see blue in the plaid when I didn't really notice it with the previous cardigans.  It's amazing how the eyes detect things in one setting that they didn't before.  Well, there is no cooler color than blue really, but with the plaid and the red heels and lipstick, I don't get frosty vibes from this outfit.  Winter?  Yes.  Cold? Not at all.  A blue like this is vibrant as still warm as far as blues go, but it doesn't have the holiday feel to it, which makes this a great option for wearing past December and that's the goal really.  Always be looking for pieces that will work all year long and with as many things as possible.

I hope you've enjoyed our little experiment with colors today.  All these lovely cardigans kept me quite warm for this photographic venture which is why MAK is my favorite cardigan.

Shopping Info:  Cardigan from MAK, Top from ThredUp, use my link to save $20 off your first purchase.  Trousers from SheIn.