Bonny Blues with VIVAIA

Thankfully, all the snow, lovely as it was, has finally melted.  Although we are due for round two of snow and ice in 2023 very shortly, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to get a few pics of the whole outfit without my feet being buried under 30cm/12 inches of snow.  

This is my first time trying the Bonny Flats, and already I'm in love!  They are so soft and lightweight; they're the perfect blue for all my French Cottage Puff dresses, and these bows are so cute, they really take the cake.  Just in case you're not a fan of bows, the Bonny flats also come in a smooth and knotted top variation.

Out of my dear love for VIVAIA's flats, I am determined to have a pair in every color so I can wear a pair with every outfit, so naturally, I needed some baby blues to go with all my cottage and princess core dresses like this Van Gogh Tea Rose from Selkie, but I know they'll look perfect with trousers and skirts too.

With their soft knit outer fabric and cushy insoles these Bonny Flats may just be my most comfortable flats yet and you can save an extra 10% off your purchase at VIVAIA with code VIVAIA10

I'm so glad I got this opportunity to get some photos before the next round of bad weather hits.  I get very impatient when I have outfit ideas and I can't share them with you, especially when they're this gorgeous!  Oh, to have my own studio!  Maybe that will be my next project, because I definitely need a warm space at times like this, I can only handle so many snow photos.

More great outfits with these incredibly comfortable Bonny Flats are most certainly on the way... as soon as the snow clears up.

Shopping Info: Bonny Flats in Denim Blue-$79 from VIVAIA,Save an extra 10% with code VIVAIA10 Selkie Starry Night Tea Rose Dress from QuinnHop.com

Over 40 Shades of Grey

For the past few years I've been in the care of a holistic health care practitioner.  My regular physician recommended that I pursue holistic treatments out of concern that western medicine's approach would be more harmful than beneficial, so I spoke with several practitioners before finding the person I still currently see.  How is all of this relevant to today's post?  

Well, my CHHP has requested a hair sample for mineral analysis so that we can get the right vitamins and minerals to support my health.  In order to provide that sample I have to grow my hair out several inches.  In the process of growing it out, I am finding out just how grey I've gone since I began coloring my hair seven years ago.  Since my holistic doc doesn't care too much about my photo schedule, I just had to leave the greys and go a little more au naturel in this photo shoot.  So, please pardon my roots but my greys just happen to be the perfect accessory with these VIVAIA boots and my sweater.

Turns out, after not seeing this much of my natural color for so long, I've gone really, really gray.  I'm over 40, with two teenagers in the house, so the fact that I've gone gray is no surprise.  It's not something I love, but since it's for a good cause, I thought I might was well embrace, even celebrate the gray with today's post of VIVAIA's Pandora Mid Calf Grey Boots.  I may not be crazy about my greys, but these grey boots are fantastic!  And, you can save an extra 10% with my code VIVAIA10.

I'm always looking for clothes to keep me warm and comfortable through the winter and these boots are just the ticket.  With low heels on anti-slip rubber soles, I don't have to worry about losing my footing on slick surfaces.  And their soft breathable knit and lace up backs ensure the most comfortable and customized fit. 

And since we are keeping things natural, I should add that these boots are made of a blend of ethically sourced wool and recycled plastic bottles.  The packaging is recycled cardboard, and even the soles are made of recycled rubber.  They're easy to clean and care for.

So, while I may not love my grey, I am thrilled about these VIVAIA boots  and I can't wait to spend the winter in comfort wearing these boots with mini skirts, leather shorts and so many smart styles.

Shopping Info:  Pandora Square-toe Back Lace Mid Calf Boots-$159 from VIVAIA  Save an extra 10% with code VIVAIA10

Selkie Winter Sale

 

After a brief hiatus, Selkie reopened their doors at Midnight, PST with a winter sale.  Up to 40% off select products starting 1/27 @ midnight pst - 1/29 Here's what I snagged at the sale:  

The Crimson Beach Day Dress was something I nearly bought in the fall launch.  It looks perfect for winter and holidays, just the right blend of cottage and princess,  "Prairie Princess," maybe?  Whatever the case, I was drawn to it, but I just didn't love it enough to pay full price.  Thanks to the sale and the promo code (Yes!  You can stack your sale savings with promo codes!) I saved about $85.

There are some great savings here and you can stack them with a promo code to save an extra 10%.  I don't make any money off these codes, but I'm sure these lovely affiliates appreciate it when you use them as much as we like getting an extra discount.

So give these lovely people a little love by using their promo codes and save an extra 10% yourself in the process, win-win!

SAMMIIASH

Queen

Tammy

TICIJA

MaryBears

PetiteDoll

Snowy Days; Starry Nights

Snow, snow, snow.  We've had a nice little dusting of snow here and a few snow days to go along with it.  After dashing out to get some photos in this lovely, fresh snow, I've mostly been indoors with the fam keeping warm. 

As soon as I heard that there would be snow in the forecast, I knew I'd be photographing this dress as well as getting a head start on my Christmas outfits for this year.  I know, it's a bit early to be thinking of Christmas, I just got my tree put away a few days ago, but snow in December is a rarity here, so I thought I may as well take advantage, especially since while my tree has been put away, my Christmas outfits are still waiting to go into storage and were quite handy when I was getting ready this morning.

I wasn't such a fan of the Van Gogh prints on these Selkie Tea Rose dresses initially.  I'm not exactly sure why, but they just didn't speak to me until a few months ago and then suddenly I loved them and had to have them.  I bought both of my Van Gogh dresses second hand, and I saved a little bit but not much.  I didn't mind, I was too smitten.

Thanks to the holidays and a couple of Royal Mail postal strikes, it took about 6-8 weeks for this dress to arrive, but it was worth the wait and I've already got the perfect pair of VIVAIA flats to wear with it, as soon as this snow melts so that you can actually see my feet.

While the snow lasts, I am enjoying this beautiful winter wonderland out my window.  The window, I might add which is clear and has my vintage arm chair returned to its proper place next to it since I finally got the Christmas tree down.

So, on this first official snow day, once the photos were done, I curled up with a cup of tea to enjoy the scenery from my chair and then, since we were already in a lulled state, we watched an archaeology documentary, which is pretty interesting when you have nothing else to do and nowhere else to go.  I call this snow day a win.

Shopping Info: Selkie Starry Night Tea Rose Dress from QuinnHop

Create the Occasion

Some of the major holidays may be over but that doesn't mean you can't celebrate.  In a recent online chat, a member of a community I'm in asked the question, "If I don't have any friends, and no where to wear my dresses, should I just sell my collection?"  You can imagine the responses of dress lovers such as myself were overwhelmingly against selling the dresses. Most replied that they wore their dresses at home if no where else and as long as they bring you joy, you should keep them.  I completely agree, but I added this to the thread:  Don't wait for the opportunity to wear your dresses, instead, be pro-active and create the opportunities.

Recently I held a very small gathering for a few co-workers called a "Whine & Cheese Party."  We congregated to eat some amazing little snacks and to air any grievances we had been holding in.  I served Brie, drizzled with honey and toasted pecans, a little warmed Boursin, dried fruits, roasted almonds, a variety of crackers, and I brought some very decadent chocolate truffles as a dessert.  And did I dress for the occasion?  You better believe it.  

I don't have a lot of friends.  In fact these people aren't my friends, or at least they didn't start out that way, but by creating this opportunity for me to do something nice for them and get to know them, I think we're becoming friends.  I genuinely enjoyed spending time with my co-workers, talking and getting to really know them as people, not just colleagues.  Plus, I got to wear a pretty dress.  Everyone wins!

I recently watched Mrs. Harris Goes to Paris for the first time.  It was the newer version, not the original with Angela Lansbury, but it was delightful.  Mrs. Harris has been waiting for her husband to return from the war so long, she's grown old.  She's been a maid cleaning homes for the wealthy while living a meager life.  Then she sees the most beautiful dress in the world, a Christian Dior.  She determines to save up, go to Paris, and buy her own beautiful gown.   It spoke to me in a very personal way, and yet it is universal in the sense that I think there is something in all of us that longs for something special and beautiful, something that seems out of place in our workaday lives but calls to our deepest yearnings all the same.  If you want it, you have to work for it until it is within reach and then take hold of it and never let go no matter how silly it seems or what other people say.

I remember my first pretty dress.  I was in my late 20s, had two children, and my life revolved around the needs of others.  I worked at home cooking, cleaning, educating, and had no reason whatsoever to wear anything nice.  No matter how I tried to create connections with people, that also seemed to fail.  I was lonely and my self esteem was at rock bottom.  I felt invisible to the whole world, including the people who relied on me every single day.  No one seemed to value me in any capacity outside of what I could do for them.  I needed to do something for myself.  I needed to be more than "the maid," even if it was just for a few moments.

Then I saw an ad for the loveliest dress I'd ever seen, the Par Avion dress from ModCloth.  I called my mom and we looked at it together.  I didn't have any money, no way of earning any, and no way to justify the expense.  Then, like the proverbial Christmas miracle, my mom sent me enough money to buy the dress and one more.  It opened a door for me, a door to a part of myself that I thought I would never see again.  It allowed me to grow and live life more on my own terms.  And as far as meeting people goes, I wasn't looking for conversation starters, but more people approach me to compliment my dresses than I could have ever imagined. 

Don't wait for the life you dream of; do the work and make your dreams happen.  If you want something, a pretty dress or anything else, don't wait for the opportunity to buy it or wear it; create the opportunities for both.  And, who knows, you might meet some people and make some new friends in the process.

Shopping Info:  Porcelain Shrug Dress from ZJOAN, Flats from SHEIN

Safe Haven

I remember when my brother came home from his first deployment.  War had aged him and his eyes didn't sparkle when he smiled like they used to, though smiling was rarer now.  Standing in our parents' house, in the doorway of his own room, he dropped his green canvas military bag, looked around the room and said, "This is a good place.  I can lay my armor down here."  I was struck by such a simple truth:  every warrior, no matter what it is you fight for, needs a place to lay their armor down.  We all need a safe place where we can find rest.  

Solitude, safety and rest.  The three things I crave more than all the other necessities except breathing, and I don't have them anymore.  I worked for so many years to create a home that was safe from the chaos and hardships of the world, not just for myself but for each member of my family as well.  And yet.  While I was working to build it up, other people were tearing it down faster.  Lazy people, wicked people, lesser people.  And they won.  I hoped my job would be a safe place, but wicked people roam about searching for someone to devour and they are never full.  No peace at home,  no peace at work.  I never take my armor off.  I stay ready to fight all the time and they are times when I feel, quite literally, weary to death of the wicked old world and its constant scheming.

The stress is mounting.  All my hard work at my job and in my family have amounted to nothing.  I have poured my life out for the betterment of others and it is beginning to feel like it has been utterly pointless.  Now that I've lost so much, I'm afraid of anything good that comes along, afraid that I'll only lose it too.  Sometimes I get so caught up worrying about what I'll lose next that I forget to appreciate what I have now.  There are seasons in which I have no joy and I find no rest.  We cannot live in a constant state of fight or flight.  It wears our minds, bodies, and spirits down.  It makes us old before our time; it makes us sick.  I go on fighting because for me, quitting is not an option, but we all have to have a place where we can escape the world, and lay our armor down.

Sometimes there are people in our lives who create a safe haven for us, but more often than not we have to carve out a safe and peaceful place for ourselves and then hide it from the world if we want to hang onto it.  Sometimes it's not so much a place as it is a time of day that's devoted to rest and solitude, but it's necessary all the same.  We need a place, a moment, a season, to stop fighting, stop worrying and be at peace.  For me, right now, it's 20 minutes twice a week in a mineral bath with healing music playing.  I have to make myself find joy in the simple things if no where else, because I cannot live without joy.  No one gave this to me, I had to make this place and take this time for myself.  I have to have a place to lay my armor down.  It's not enough, but it's all I've got and it's better than nothing.  

Shopping Info:  The Romantics Dress in The Unicorn Defends Himself from Selkie and IvorySheep  belt and cardi from SHEIN

Plaid Puffs and Farm Days

Although I haven't turned on the t.v. to watch the news in several years now, I've heard it mentioned by friends and acquaintances that it's not just our little part of the world that's been feeling this arctic chill but rather the whole country.  While we only had perhaps an inch of snow, the temperatures were double digits below freezing which creates some challenges in both farm and city living.

The city roads are rarely in better shape than ours, but they do see the plows much sooner than we, so getting to work is often delayed longer for us than it is for our urban and suburban counter parts.  While the loss of income from being snowed-in isn't something I look forward to, especially with spring fashion launches just around the corner and me trying to save every extra penny, it's very often necessary to have at least one person stay home on such days to make sure that all the animals are kept warm and fed.

Snow days such as this create a unique and pleasant blend of busyness and boredom, of frenzy and rest.  The water freezes within minutes to an hour of being placed outside for the animals and so must be constantly broken up in the trough or else carried inside to thaw by the fireside and then taken back out again.  Their housing must be checked so that any layers of insulation torn off by rough winds are replaced immediately, and of course, they must be fed extra to replace all the calories they burn in the cold.  In the human world of year round abundance of food and warm clothing, we forget that animals need to spend the spring and summer saving up extra fat to tolerate the cold seasons.  

As much as we try to prepare, there is always the risk of a casualty.  This particular storm already has cost us the life of one silly, sneaky chicken who separated from the flock and froze to death, which is a sad loss but not so bad as it could be considering just how cold it has been.  We're hoping that this is the end of our losses this winter but since winter is really just beginning, that may be too much to hope, and so it means we must be extra vigilant to care for creatures who are sometimes too foolish to care for themselves. 

Living on a farm is time consuming work, but so purposeful that we hardly notice.  At the end of days like this my fatigue is satisfying because it means that my work has meant something to someone, even if that someone is a chicken or a pig.  And even though the snow days could easily lead to cabin fever, we have to snow-suit up and go outside and face the cold multiple times a day, so we never really get bored being inside.

At times like this I feel myself torn between two worlds.  Lately, with one child driving and another learning, both of them needing their own cars, the double (soon to be triple and then quadruple) cost of our car insurance, college tuition looming, the fact that we still haven't built a house, is all adding up to pressure to work full time so that we'll be a little more financially comfortable.  But on these days, and maybe more often than this, it is absolutely necessary that someone be here tend the home fires both literally and figuratively.

Before we had a family, Mr. Bleu and I both remembered how our home lives had suffered when our own mothers went to work full time and we agreed that when we did have a family, one of us would be at home as much as possible, including through the teen years, to keep our home running smoothly.  Easier said than done.  The teenage years are notoriously difficult as attitudes and egos erupt from previously darling human beings, but these years also become exponentially more expensive.  Since the attitude already makes it easier to be away from your kids when they become so unpleasant, and finances are so demanding most people use this age as the time to return to the work force.  I believe that even though children this age are pushing their parents away as hard as the possibly can, they still need them much more than they will admit and this is why we've persisted to some degree in having a keeper of the home.

Temporarily going back to work never seems to be temporary.  There is always one more expense that pops up and demands the extra income and I'm rather afraid that if I give in, I will miss these last few years of my children being at home and I will be like most of the older women I meet who wish they'd given it just a little more time before going back to work because they can't ever get those years back.  And if the children weren't a big enough factor in my decision, there is also the farm to consider.  I'm afraid that we would have to give up many aspects of the farm for lack of time and energy to care for it.  It's a lot to consider and there doesn't seem to be any right answer.

As we start this new year, there may be some big changes here, or some big decisions that nothing should change just yet.  I'm not sure how it will all work out, standing at the beginning of last year I never could have guessed how things would turn out, but this is life.  Sometimes we take the lead and sometimes we are simply swept along by it.  I hope this year brings more prosperity and less grief than the previous, more meaningful work and less wasting of time, but I suppose we'll just have to see where it goes.

Shopping Info:  Plaid Puff Dress-$22, Tights and Headband from Shein, Boots and jewelry from Forever 21