In December I bought some of those hot cocoa Hershey's kisses. They only come this one time per year and I LOOOOOOOOOOVE them! Last year my holistic doc had me on a special and very restricted diet. It made the holidays a real drag and I only got two or three of these special candies, but this year I decided to buy a couple of bags and make them last as long as possible.
A couple of weeks after buying them, I was cleaning out the cabinets and pulled the shriveled husk of one of my Hershey's kisses bags off the shelf. It seems my oldest child had opened and then consumed the entire bag secretly. THE ENTIRE BAG! I would have shared if she had asked, but she didn't and my stash of my favorite Christmas candy was now reduced by half.
Naturally, and like any reasonable adult, I totally lost it. There was yelling and guilt tripping and I may or may not have privately shed a tear. Not just because of the loss of candy, although that did hurt my feelings because I rarely indulge and my kid buys candy all the time and could have bought her own bag of candy anytime she wanted, but also because I hate it when people lie and steal. I hate it even more when someone I love lies and steals from me.
Flash forward two weeks and I was feeling like having some chocolate one evening, so I decided to break open that second bag. I pulled it from the shelf and it was so light it fairly flew off the shelf. That's because it had been opened and consumed down to the last few pieces. I stormed into the living room and demanded to know who the culprit was.
To my surprise my youngest raised her hand. Even after she witnessed the brutal tongue lashing and guilt tripping her sister received she decided not to be outdone, to brave the consequences and eat 3/4 of my last bag of chocolate. And oh, brother did I verbally lay into her.
Flash forward three more weeks and I was getting dressed for the day when I thought that this new pair of pastel tentacle earrings might just perfectly match my outfit. I started to ask if I could borrow them, but then I remembered that I don't have to ask because they can't say no--to anything I want. My children now owe me. They owe me one favor, or one borrowed-without-asking article of clothing, or an accessory, for every piece of chocolate they consumed. Oh, my, yeeeeessss. They are now deeply in my debt and the guilt trips will never end! In fact I'm thinking for having "I can't believe you ate my chocolate!" inscribed on my tombstone. Their joint effort at theft has turned out to be the sweetest gift they've ever given me and I intend to savor it, and in the process maybe teach them about the long lasting consequences of their choices....but mostly it's the savoring of the revenge.
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